gnostic3's definitions

Johnny Appleweed

n. mythical figure who travels about the land whistling Grateful Dead tunes and planting marijuana seeds.

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Dude! Look at what is coming up in the garden! I did not plant those man.

Looks like the work of Johnny Appleweed. Did you leave a bong under your pillow last week?

by gnostic3 August 2, 2020

final stones tour

n. Any once-in-a-lifetime event that will be repeated and repeated ad nauseum.

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Have we heard the last of this impeachment thing?

No way. It’s a final stones tour.

by gnostic3 February 13, 2020

justicetears

n. The physical manifestation of the emotional upheaval caused by the realisation that centuries of evolving democratic justice have been brutally erased by a tyrant.

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Why are you crying little one?

The spirits of truth and democracy lie in the ashes. I cry justicetears.

I told you not to watch Game of Thrones.

by gnostic3 February 10, 2020

slutwipe

n. Brief, largely inadequate, method of bathing one’s dirty bits whilst tenting in the freezing cold wilderness miles away from soap, water, and privacy.

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Ready to hike up to that cwm Kay? The morning sun is just burning the frost off our hanging gloves.

In a mo. Just doing a bit of a slutwipe in me sleeping bag.

Right. Well I’ll just have a little dump in this recyclable bag.

by gnostic3 May 11, 2024

wallaby’s uncle

n. Australian skateboarder term for a loser, usually from Perth.

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Cricket mate! I don’t mean to belittle your new Nike strides but those pommey abominations make you look like a wallaby’s uncle.

No offence taken Bruce. Me gran in Perth sent them out via bush plane for Anzac Day.

by gnostic3 April 26, 2019

vaccy

n. Australian vacuum cleaner.

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Time you bought a vaccy Bruce. The grub droppings have formed an escarpment in your Shiela’s cage that would put the Blue Mountains to shame.

by gnostic3 April 6, 2021

liife

n. Existence, only with two eyes, so you can see the nonsense coming.

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Next time through I am asking God to give me liife.

And a better haircut.

by gnostic3 February 19, 2024