Talmanes's definitions

blow career

A phrase used to describe the actions of someone who gives copious amounts of oral sex, well above what most people would consider an average amount for a sexually active person. As job is to career, so blow job is to blow career--someone who gives "blow careers" has almost taken oral sex to an extreme level, pursuing it as if there's some sort of reward in the afterlife for people who give that much head.

Man, Suzie went down on the entire football team at the party last week. That girl doesn't just give blow jobs--she's got a blow career!

I thought my last girlfriend was good about oral, but this girl I'm seeing now comes out of nowhere with it sometimes. I get head two, three times a day without asking, like it's her blow career.

Dude, I feel sorry for Tyrone. His ass went to prison and bitched out, and now he's got himself a blow career on the inside.

by Talmanes December 3, 2006

hunnert

n.pl. or An oft-heard country mispronunciation of "hundred," that being a numerical value equal to 10 x 10, numbering between 99 and 101.

I gave that dancer at the titty bar a hunnert dollar bill.

There're a hunnert reasons I shouldn't marry you, Suzie, and most of 'em is that I'm already married to Betty.

I musta told you a hunnert times not to do that!

by Talmanes February 6, 2006

wiffli

Acronym for "when I fucking feel like it." Useful as a catch-all answer for when you're going to get something done.

Boss: When are those floors gonna get swept?
Employee: Wiffli.

A: When are we going to the store tomorrow, anyway?
B: Probably wiffli and not before.

I'll get to it wiffli, man. Don't get all bent out of shape.

by Talmanes November 17, 2007

sinfulicious

An adjective used to describe something that is simultaneously fantastic and evil or terrible, such as drinking a beer someone was saving for themselves, driving someone else's nice car without permission, or sleeping with someone who's cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend. In other words, a good thing made better by it being forbidden, but which also causes a bit of guilt.

I promised myself I'd stick to my diet, but I ended up eating some of that cheesecake anyway, and it was sinfulicious.

Man, that married chick is so hot, it's sinfulicious to be watching her like this.

I stole these sunglasses from my brother. They're awesome, but he's pissed. Totally sinfulicious.

by Talmanes November 30, 2005

not hetero

Phrase used to describe something which is not heterosexual, it would literally be applied toward homosexuality. It is, however, more often applied pejoratively to negative situations, being used in place of gay when saying that something is lame or stupid.

Dude, you ate all of my donuts? That is so not hetero.

Seriously, guys, you need to stop talking about how often you watch America's Next Top Model. It's not hetero.

When Jess and Steve sit together on the bench with their arms around each other, I want to say it's seriously not hetero, but I know they're straight.

by Talmanes December 3, 2006

both kinds of gay

A phrase uttered by Teresa Strasser on "the Adam Carolla Show" after she had quietly criticized Adam Carolla's use of the word "gay" to mean "lame" rather than "homosexual" during the bit "the Gayest Songs of All Time." Immediately afterward, Culture Club's "Karma Chameleon" was played, to which Teresa uttered, "That's both kinds of gay," meaning it was both lame and homosexual in content. Amusingly, the original meaning of gay, "happy," does not enter into the phrase.

Tony got drunk and told you he wanted to give you a bj? Dude, that's both kinds of gay.

Would it be both kinds of gay if a girl grabbed another girl's boobs and asked if they were fake, or just one? And which one?

by Talmanes December 3, 2006

vague date

A phrase coined by Teresa Strasser of the Adam Carolla Show on Free FM which refers to social outings that would normally be considered dates, but where one of the two people involved seems completely oblivious to the concept of dating. This is generally characterized by a lack of interest in conversation or flirting, an aimless absence of direction or goals for the evening, and possibly an uncomfortable revelation that the event was never intended to be date. This can be blamed on the modern tendency for self-absorption and a narcissistic belief that you shouldn't have to put forth any effort to be interesting or even pleasant.

I ended up going on a vague date with Jim. We went and saw a stupid buddy comedy and ate at Starbucks, but he split when he got a phone call from a friend to play basketball.

I don't even know if the date I was on with Nancy was a date, because she kept talking to me about how great it was to be single. I think it was some weird vague date.

by Talmanes May 30, 2007