Talmanes's definitions

first basing

The verb form of first base (which means French kissing or making out), "first basing" someone is kissing them passionately or making out with them. Used to great effect by Strong Sad of Homestar Runner fame when speaking to his brother Strong Bad, spied kissing a piece of paper.

Uh, Strong Bad, were you just first basing it with that piece of loose leaf?

I went to go ask my brother a question and caught him totally first basing his study buddy.

I was so drunk last week that I ended up first basing my friend's girl.

by Talmanes June 2, 2007

ninjun

A slang term combining ninja and injun, used to describe Native Americans depicted as having superhuman fighting skills. The term is generally applied to popular film depictions of Native American combat prowess, such as "Brotherhood of the Wolf," and seems to have begun with "Last of the Mohicans."

Dude, that ninjun totally did a backflip onto that dude's head and then threw a tomahawk into his partner's face, then he did a spin kick and knocked the sheriff off the side of a cliff!

by Talmanes November 5, 2005

Sailor Porn

A specific style of porn -- almost always existing as stag films and isolated porn clips -- that begins as a gangbang of multiple men and one woman, but eventually phases out the woman's role and devolves into male gay porn. The term "sailor porn" is used as a descriptor because of the perception that a large number of men in the Navy are homosexual.

I once found this old porn tape at my uncle's, and it had these four guys fucking one girl, but then the girl was gone and it went on with just the guys for like, twenty minutes. I asked my friend about it years later, and he said, "Oh, that was sailor porn!"

Man, this place is such a sausage fest. I don't even want to hit on the one hot chick here because I'm worried this'll turn into some serious sailor porn after too much vodka

by Talmanes November 7, 2010

RETARDED

n., obviously meaning retarded. Pronounced letter-by-letter (AR-EE-TEE-AY-AR-EE-TEE-DEE), it is a play on the acronyms ADD and ADHD, used in situations where someone claims Attention Defecit Disorder or Attention Defecit Hyperactivity Disorder as the cause of their idiotic behavior.

A: Sorry about that, man. I've got ADD.
B: You sure that's not RETARDED?

I was acting like such an ass that I thought I might have ADHD, but no; turns out it's just RETARDED.

Hey, I really am taking meds for ADD, so don't say I have RETARDED! I'm not retarded!

by Talmanes December 26, 2006

Texas toupee

A Texas toupee is a cowboy hat (usually a Stetson), so named because it easily hides the pate of a balding cowboy. The popularity of the Stetson in Texas gave rise to the alliterative term.

No hairpieces for me, ma'am -- if I'm hidin' my bald spot, I'll do it behind a Texas toupee.

Man, that is a serious Texas toupee. How much did you pay for it?

I'll skip the hat store. It's all Texas toupees in there, anyway.

by Talmanes December 9, 2008

strunz

(n.) From the Italian "strunzo," meaning "piece of shit." A fairly common Italian insult for someone or something worthless.

Get a load of this strunz out here, sleepin' on the job!

My lawnmower's a fuckin' strunz. It won't start for nothin'.

by Talmanes May 27, 2006

vague date

A phrase coined by Teresa Strasser of the Adam Carolla Show on Free FM which refers to social outings that would normally be considered dates, but where one of the two people involved seems completely oblivious to the concept of dating. This is generally characterized by a lack of interest in conversation or flirting, an aimless absence of direction or goals for the evening, and possibly an uncomfortable revelation that the event was never intended to be date. This can be blamed on the modern tendency for self-absorption and a narcissistic belief that you shouldn't have to put forth any effort to be interesting or even pleasant.

I ended up going on a vague date with Jim. We went and saw a stupid buddy comedy and ate at Starbucks, but he split when he got a phone call from a friend to play basketball.

I don't even know if the date I was on with Nancy was a date, because she kept talking to me about how great it was to be single. I think it was some weird vague date.

by Talmanes May 30, 2007