westfalia's definitions

weed mentor

A person in your life (usually older than you by a few years) that takes you under their wing and teaches you all they know about marijuana. Lessons include: 'how to smoke', 'how to roll a joint', 'how to satisfy the munchies' and 'how to make your own bong'.

Duder 1: "So what are we doing here at your friends place?"

Duder 2: "Check this."

Duder 1: "Whoa dude is that what I think it is? I don't know how to use that."

Duder 2: "Don't worry man, I'll be your weed mentor."

by westfalia January 13, 2010

suicide pause

A long period of painful, awkward silence when you're talking with your girl about something important. These long pauses make you seriously consider suicide.

Duder: "I don't want you to stop flirting with asian guys because of me, I just want you to understand how I feel"

Chica : "Yeah, I know"

*long silence*

Duder: "What are you thinking?"

Chica: "About what I should do"

*long silence*

Duder: "Damn, another suicide pause. Let's wrap this up before I go off the deep end."

by westfalia December 30, 2009

ride stank

The powerful and unstoppable odor you can't get out of your car. Most common ride stanks are pet-related or food-related.

Duder 1: "Holy shit it stinks up in your Lancer doggy!"

Duder 2: "I know dude, I can't get rid of it. My beagle puked his fucking guts out a couple weeks ago."

Duder 1: "Damn dude, he's such a dick. This is one ride stank I'll never be able to get out of my nose ya herd!"

by westfalia January 4, 2010

classic as fuck

Something that is extremely timeless and will never get old.

Duder 1: "Ha ha I can't believe he stepped on that burning bag full of dog shit."

Duder 2: "I know, that trick is classic as fuck."

Duder 1: "All right, let's go, we got 15 more houses to hit."

by westfalia December 21, 2009

native foreigner

A person that was born in the US, but spent a big portion of their life in a foreign country before coming back to the US. Native foreigners tend to act like real foreigners with US papers.

Duder 1: "So-a I come-a to this-a country with $5 and I am-a going to a make-a millions rapping."

Duder 2: "Dude were you born in Italy? You sound so foreign especially when you rap."

Duder 1: "No doggy, I was straight born in Miami son!"

Duder 2: "Damn! You are one native foreigner for sure doggy."

by westfalia February 1, 2010

poolympics

The olympics of pooping competitions. Games include: seeing who can poo the most times in one day, seeing who can poo the most by mass in one day and seeing who can clog the toilet the most times in one day. The poolympics typically contain 2-4 male 'athletes'.

Duder 1: "You ready for some poolympics dude?"

Duer 2: "Yea, what you wanna do? How about seeing who can clog the shitter the most today?"

Duder 1: "Sounds good to me! I downed 4 burritos last night, just in case you wanted to play."

by westfalia December 29, 2009

brake happy

A condition where you frequently tap or step on your brakes when you don't need to. Most brake happy people are senior citizens or people that are terrified of or intrigued by everything on the road. Being stuck behind a brake happy person makes you seriously consider driving off of a cliff.

Duder 1: "What the fuck? Why is he braking? There is no one in front of him and this lane doesn't end for another mile."

Duder 2: "It's probably because there's an abandoned tire on the side of the road up there too. He's such a brake happy puss."

Duder 1: "Damn people like this should just ride the bus."

by westfalia January 15, 2010