westfalia's definitions

jerk smirk

The look a guy gets on his face while masturbating. Most males get a jerk smirk on their face because of the uncontrollable pleasure they are feeling. A jerk smirk can last for several minutes after a guy ejaculates.

Duder 1: "Hurry up in there dude, I gotta trim my bush."

Duder 2: (comes out of bathroom) "Sorry dude, it's all yours."

Duder 1: "What the hell is that jerk smirk on your face for? Awww dude if I step on any of your nasty ass cum..."

by westfalia December 29, 2009

awkward dad moment

When a person's father says something inappropriate or uncomfortable in front of their child. This most commonly happens in front of the child's friends when they are a teenager or grown-up.

Dad: "So, anyway I found out she likes it when I shoot it on her face. It happened on accident of course, but it ended up being a good thing."

Kid 1: "Sick dad! That's my mom! What an awkward dad moment."

Kid 2: "Whoa dude your dad is a freak!"

by westfalia December 17, 2009

tardy circumcision

The removal of a male's foreskin at a very late time in his life. Most common late circumcisions occur when a foreign male comes to the US in his teens and wants to be circumsized to fit in with all the other dudes.

Duder: "What's going on man? How was your weekend?"

Foreigner: "Oh man you won't believe this. I got circumsized."

Duder: "Say what!?! Dude you're 14! Didn't that shit hurt?"

Foreigner: "Yea man, you have no idea. It is still killing me."

Duder: "That is one tardy circumcision for sure!"

by westfalia January 4, 2010

poolympics

The olympics of pooping competitions. Games include: seeing who can poo the most times in one day, seeing who can poo the most by mass in one day and seeing who can clog the toilet the most times in one day. The poolympics typically contain 2-4 male 'athletes'.

Duder 1: "You ready for some poolympics dude?"

Duer 2: "Yea, what you wanna do? How about seeing who can clog the shitter the most today?"

Duder 1: "Sounds good to me! I downed 4 burritos last night, just in case you wanted to play."

by westfalia December 29, 2009

still introduction

When one person is introduced to another by means of an infamous picture.

Duder: "So here's a picture of my roommate. Well, it's of his ass anyway, it's the hairiest thing I've ever seen."

Chica: "Whoa! That is hairy! I'll never be able to get that out of my mind. That's probably the worst still introduction ever."

by westfalia December 22, 2009

Oreo amateur

A person who doesn't know that Oreo cookies are made for milk and best when dunked in milk.

Foreigner: "Hold on I'll be right back." (comes back with Oreos and a glass of milk)

Duder: "Oh sweet dude, Oreos! Love them shits."

Foreigner: "Me too." (eats one Oreo then drinks milk)

Duder: "What the fuck are you doing? Dude you have to dunk them shits in there and let it get a little soggy."

Foreigner: (Dunks Oreo then takes a bite) "WOW! That is amazing. Nobody does that in my home country. Thanks doggy!"

Duder: "Good think I came along, otherwise you'd be an Oreo amateur all your life."

by westfalia December 18, 2009

public rage

Any act of violence or aggression in a public place.

Chica: "We're through! I've been cheating on you for the past 3 months!"

Duder: "Ahhhhh you bitch!" (punches a tree)

Chica: "Seriously? Nice display of public rage. You're such a loser."

by westfalia December 15, 2009