MadamexXx's definitions

Birth Control Shirt

This is a shirt my first husband got second hand and I could tell why. As soon as he put that shirt on, it looked so bad that I was forced to shut my eyes because it was emotionally traumatizing to look at it. The combination of print, pattern and color produced such a cataclysm of visual assault that I needed six months of therapy to deal with it. It is the equivalent of seeing your loved one wearing a Jason from Halloween mask, which is almost as scary.

When my husband wore the birth control shirt, I knew that there would be no chance of him cheating on me. I was surprised it didn't render him sterile. It was one ugly-ass unflattering shirt. I threw it away and he divorced me anyway.

by MadamexXx March 13, 2009

Conversate

The real word is "converse," as "orientate" is really meant to be the word "orient." There is a difference between being creative and verbal rather than sounding stupid because you think you have game.

Guy: "I came over here to conversate and become orientated with you."
Girl: "WTF? I thought you just wanted to talk and get to know me better."
See you stupid that sounds? Please, for the love of God, stop saying that stupid shit. Don't you want to be somebody?

by MadamexXx March 13, 2009

DarkMaskDiva

An underground writer who associates with liberals, revolutionaries and militants.

DarkMaskDiva is obsessed with irony.

by MadamexXx February 5, 2009

Daddy Pimp Juice

He's the man. He's got the wardrobe, the women, the dollas, the best car and everyone looks up to him. He's the type of dude that people want to make movies about. He's a straight gangsta.

Daddy Pimp Juice came up and told that busta he was a jive turkey and the dude was speechless.
I asked my friend who that fine ass man was and she said: "Didn't you know? That's Daddy Pimp Juice."
My kids want to take Daddy Pimp Juice for show and tell.
Daddy Pimp Juice has the best swag in the neighborhood.

by MadamexXx February 11, 2009

Domestic Terrorist

Anyone you're living with who won't let you sleep, give you privacy, makes too much noise, tries to throw cock blocks when you have someone you're interested in over, borrows your clothes without asking, takes up too much time in the bathroom, has their obnoxious friends over too much and is basically a pain in the ass to live with. These people are usually not right in the head or have a substance abuse issue or is just plain old inconsiderate. Any intolerable child.

My roomate makes too much noise when I'm trying to sleep. She's a domestic terrorist.
Dennise is a domestic terrorist. She tries to wear my sexy underwear and tries to steal my boyfriends.
I won't babysit that loud-ass kid. He's a domestic terrorist.
My husband always has the TV up too loud. He's a domestic terrorist.
I had to break up with Danny because he'd get drunk at night and do a bunch of noisy and obnoxious shit so I couldn't sleep. He is a domestic terrorist.

by MadamexXx February 9, 2009

Tweaker Shopping

Also known as dumpster looting and stealing other peoples' recyclables. Could also mean shoplifting. Sometimes it occurs at 3AM in 24-hour stores like Wal*Mart and the whole place is crawling with tweakers.

1. My friends went tweaker shopping and scored me a new bra ot of the neighbor's dumpster. It fit too.
2. I needed to get diapers in the middle of the night and could have done some tweaker shopping.
3. That spun-out freak got arrested for tweaker shopping and now there's a picture up of her in the store.
4. Dude found every last piece of my jigsaw puzzle. It was like he was tweaker shopping.

by MadamexXx February 13, 2009