MadamexXx's definitions

Before Picture

This is when somebody's body is misshapen by poor eating habits or drugs, tacky outfit or outdated. It's somebody whose look you would change if you could.

I decided to go on a diet because I was starting to look like a Before Picture naked.
With that Billy Ray Cyrus mullet, he looked like a Before Picture.
Her yellow teeth made her look like a Before Picture.

by MadamexXx February 25, 2009

Grisly Steamer

A large and extra stinky bowel movement that you break into a sweat taking. It is usually time consuming and you have to bite on a washcloth while taking it. This is fun for guys who have been drinking to joke about using a different sort of accent, usually proper British.

"Ryan was in the bathroom for a half an hour taking a grisly steamer."
"That grisly steamer almost had me calling 911."
"Shawn is still talking about a grisly steamer he took last year."
"If you want to repulse a guy and you're a girl, talk about taking a grisly steamer."
"That grisly steamer made me want to slap my mom."

by MadamexXx February 25, 2009

Orientate

The word is supposed to be "orient." I'm not sure why people think orientate is the word, but it sounds like something dumb people make up to sound intelligent. They need to orient themselves with the English language.

I went to orientation to become orientated.
I'm not redneck-orientated. I know how to speak English.
Everytime I hear the word "Orientated" I want to cringe. It's as bad as hearing the word "ain't" or "warsh."

by MadamexXx February 24, 2009

Birth Control Shirt

This is a shirt my first husband got second hand and I could tell why. As soon as he put that shirt on, it looked so bad that I was forced to shut my eyes because it was emotionally traumatizing to look at it. The combination of print, pattern and color produced such a cataclysm of visual assault that I needed six months of therapy to deal with it. It is the equivalent of seeing your loved one wearing a Jason from Halloween mask, which is almost as scary.

When my husband wore the birth control shirt, I knew that there would be no chance of him cheating on me. I was surprised it didn't render him sterile. It was one ugly-ass unflattering shirt. I threw it away and he divorced me anyway.

by MadamexXx March 13, 2009

Shut Your Pie Hole

A way to tell someone to Shut the Fuck Up or Shut Up, Bitch that turns a tense moment into something funny.
It's better to say because it shows creativity and has a richer history, plus that you have more class.

That kid had diarreah of the mouth so I told him : "Shut Your Pie Hole."
I want to say: "Shut Your Pie Hole" to Eminem. He sucks.

by MadamexXx February 25, 2009

Something for your ass

When you are due a real beat down for some jive turkey move.
An unpleasant surprise.
Karma being a bitch.
A ferocious retaliation.
A promise of good sex.

When my boyfriend asked if we could have a threesome I said: "I have SOMETHING for your ass."

by MadamexXx March 3, 2009

The Dicks of Hazard

A multi-cultural open-age online gang of computer savvy people who don't take any shit off anyone just like ghetto toilet paper. If you know in your heart you can be a dick for a good cause, join The Dicks of Hazard!

1.Some crackhead kept trying to feed my dog, so I called The Dicks of Hazard.
2.This guy kept throwing cock blocks so I called The Dicks of Hazard. After they schooled me, no one threw cock blocks again.
3.Thanks to The Dicks of Hazard, that nazi never heckles me in class anymore.

by MadamexXx February 17, 2009