24 definitions by spinningtabletop
A brand of bicycle intended for off-road use on dirt or gravel trails. There is no limit to how much you can spend on them. Some of the best ones are amazingly beautiful works of high-performance technology that are also tougher than nails.
Most mountain bikes, though, are bought for fairly cheap, sometimes under $100, at department stores under brands such as Mongoose, Schwinn, or Magna. These "mountain bikes" are covered with fancy graphics, lots of gears, and suspension, but actually work very poorly:
1) The components are all bottom-of-the line, even if they have good names such as Shimano. They are heavy, poorly machined, and wear out or break quickly. The gears will usually grind and skip no matter how well you adjust them. Rims are often steel, which quickly rusts and bends out of round, is very heavy, and is never seen on decent wheels.
2) They are no fun to ride. Most of them weight at least 31-35 pounds, and the full-suspension models weigh around 45! Try riding up a hill on one of these. Most people just ride them around the streets, and the knobby tires soak up so much energy you can actually hear it. Full suspension will completely absorb any power you put out. It feels like riding through mud.
Mountain bikes are extremely popular, though, accounting for over 90% of all bikes on the average college campus. They are easier to ride than road bikes, but will prevent you from ever enjoying bike riding. If they are used for off-road use, they simply become a toy like dirt bikes that you can't use for everyday transportation. Overall, I think they are a backwards development in cycling technology.
Most mountain bikes, though, are bought for fairly cheap, sometimes under $100, at department stores under brands such as Mongoose, Schwinn, or Magna. These "mountain bikes" are covered with fancy graphics, lots of gears, and suspension, but actually work very poorly:
1) The components are all bottom-of-the line, even if they have good names such as Shimano. They are heavy, poorly machined, and wear out or break quickly. The gears will usually grind and skip no matter how well you adjust them. Rims are often steel, which quickly rusts and bends out of round, is very heavy, and is never seen on decent wheels.
2) They are no fun to ride. Most of them weight at least 31-35 pounds, and the full-suspension models weigh around 45! Try riding up a hill on one of these. Most people just ride them around the streets, and the knobby tires soak up so much energy you can actually hear it. Full suspension will completely absorb any power you put out. It feels like riding through mud.
Mountain bikes are extremely popular, though, accounting for over 90% of all bikes on the average college campus. They are easier to ride than road bikes, but will prevent you from ever enjoying bike riding. If they are used for off-road use, they simply become a toy like dirt bikes that you can't use for everyday transportation. Overall, I think they are a backwards development in cycling technology.
"Did you see my new mountain bike? It's loaded! It has full suspension, 24 gears, chrome rims..."
"Dude-do yourself a service and buy a road bike like mine. Then see if you can keep up with me on the road."
"Dude-do yourself a service and buy a road bike like mine. Then see if you can keep up with me on the road."
by spinningtabletop January 31, 2009
I was like, "I need to define this term", but my brother was, like, "no, everyone knows it already," but I was, like, "hey, I have nothing better to do."
by spinningtabletop May 20, 2009
Pathetic attempt at the simple word 'raise.' Heard in southern california. Actually used by adults, if you can believe it.
by spinningtabletop May 17, 2010
A very fashionable car that makes you look "environmentally conscious." People also think the fuel economy is unbelievably amazing.
The fact is, however, that if you are really interested in saving the environment and gas, a regular subcompact is a much better choice. Older subcompacts such as the Geo Metro, some Honda Civics, the Toyota Tercel, and so on actually got equal or better gas mileage, often above 50 mpg. There is also no electric motor or batteries to mess with, so they are cheaper and easier to fix. These reliable little cars are so cheap to buy and maintain today that it is ridiculous to claim a new Prius saves money.
They also have zero environmental impact, since the are already manufactured. In addition, hybrids' gigantic battery packs full of lead, toxic heavy metals and acid, screw the environment so badly that some people have calculated that a Hummer H3 has less environmental impact.
Also, conventional cars can be hundreds of pounds lighter without the batteries. Performance (and fuel economy) is improved. There is also more room/fewer ugly bulges/ lower aerodynamic profile without a battery pack.
However, this will not convince the liberals who only want to LOOK like they are on the right path.
The fact is, however, that if you are really interested in saving the environment and gas, a regular subcompact is a much better choice. Older subcompacts such as the Geo Metro, some Honda Civics, the Toyota Tercel, and so on actually got equal or better gas mileage, often above 50 mpg. There is also no electric motor or batteries to mess with, so they are cheaper and easier to fix. These reliable little cars are so cheap to buy and maintain today that it is ridiculous to claim a new Prius saves money.
They also have zero environmental impact, since the are already manufactured. In addition, hybrids' gigantic battery packs full of lead, toxic heavy metals and acid, screw the environment so badly that some people have calculated that a Hummer H3 has less environmental impact.
Also, conventional cars can be hundreds of pounds lighter without the batteries. Performance (and fuel economy) is improved. There is also more room/fewer ugly bulges/ lower aerodynamic profile without a battery pack.
However, this will not convince the liberals who only want to LOOK like they are on the right path.
Liberal nerd: "Everyone should own a Prius! It just makes sense! I can't believe it gets 45 mpg! I'm really just self-interested, because it will save me $$ in the long run!"
Liberal nerd who knows something about cars: Dude, my 1992 Honda Civic VX gets 60 mpg, and it looks better even though it's 17 years old. I bought it for $500 and I can do all the maintenance myself. It can also dust your battery pack on wheels.
Nerd 1: Hey, it's worth it for the status it gives me.
Liberal nerd who knows something about cars: Dude, my 1992 Honda Civic VX gets 60 mpg, and it looks better even though it's 17 years old. I bought it for $500 and I can do all the maintenance myself. It can also dust your battery pack on wheels.
Nerd 1: Hey, it's worth it for the status it gives me.
by spinningtabletop February 3, 2009
A brand of cheapo bikes sold in department stores such as Walmart. They usually are supposed to look like mountain bikes, but are not strong or light enough to actually tolerate such use, and are rarely ridden off street. They are usually extremely heavy. I do not know of one under 35 pounds.
Some of them do have decent components and function ok. The shifting is usually good. They tend to be more reliable than other department store brands. They are definitely not serious bikes, though. If you have one that you ride to work, class, etc., then you will think cycling is slow and laborious and will give it up. Spend the same amount you bought the Huffy for new and buy a used road bike on craigslist. It will make a world of difference.
They do make good presents for kids. They are nice-looking and have lots of fancy stuff on them and more gears than you can use. Not for anyone over the age of 12, though.
Some of them do have decent components and function ok. The shifting is usually good. They tend to be more reliable than other department store brands. They are definitely not serious bikes, though. If you have one that you ride to work, class, etc., then you will think cycling is slow and laborious and will give it up. Spend the same amount you bought the Huffy for new and buy a used road bike on craigslist. It will make a world of difference.
They do make good presents for kids. They are nice-looking and have lots of fancy stuff on them and more gears than you can use. Not for anyone over the age of 12, though.
Soccer mom: "I got our son a bike for his birthday. It was a huffy and it's so cool!"
Dad: "It's a good thing he hasn't acquired a taste for real bikes yet."
Dad: "It's a good thing he hasn't acquired a taste for real bikes yet."
by spinningtabletop January 31, 2009
1. A jacked-up pickup truck or SUV just begging to be pushed over. It would be a service to all other drivers on the road to humble one of these these top-heavy, oversized Urban Assault Vehicles.
2. What happens when a very pathetic, wimpy chick allows herself to be picked up by any guy mildly interested in her. Typically the guy becomes bored or dissatisfied after a short time and a breakup ensues.
2. What happens when a very pathetic, wimpy chick allows herself to be picked up by any guy mildly interested in her. Typically the guy becomes bored or dissatisfied after a short time and a breakup ensues.
1. See that pushover pickup that's tailgating me? I can't see anyone else on the road! At least in these Santa Ana winds here in the 909 should knock his truck over before my subcompact.
2. "Did you hear about Jason and Courtney? They like, totally broke up yesterday over the phone!"
"Yeah, seriously; I knew it was just another one of these pushover pickups that always fails after a month."
2. "Did you hear about Jason and Courtney? They like, totally broke up yesterday over the phone!"
"Yeah, seriously; I knew it was just another one of these pushover pickups that always fails after a month."
by spinningtabletop January 31, 2009
An analogue to the Freudian slip that involves a physical action. This action must be indicative of a subconscious preoccupation or habit.
Fabio and Felipe were hanging out. Fabio was eating an apple when all of a sudden the core slipped from his hand and fell to the floor. Felipe thus inferred a subconscious propensity of Fabio to litter on his own floor, creating a literal Caleian slip.
Named after the first man to observe and recognize one such "slip".
Named after the first man to observe and recognize one such "slip".
by spinningtabletop November 13, 2010