selmabouvier's definitions

trekking the Sahara

in the midst of a really big sexual drought. tearing the labels off items everywhere. no sign of sex anywhere. definitely not on the friendship horizon, or anywhere else.

- Jeez, you're shaking.
- I know, I know.
- Jim Beam Hand?
- God no. Trekking the Sahara. Three months.
- Good Lord! I'll mercyfuck you if I have to!

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003

a quick drink

a night you will never remember, phone numbers you will never ring, 90 per cent bruising and a ravished bank account.

- Fancy a quick drink?
- Sure...

the next evening

- Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003

illusionist

A friend who's shit at keeping in touch - they appear and disappear at will/random.

- So have you seen Alan recently?
- No, no one has.
- He some kind of illusionist or something?
- Guess so.

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003

whipping baby

serial scapegoat - someone who always gets the blame for stuff.

- I've had it up to here with being Mona's whipping baby.
- Fuck her.
- That may have been part of the problem.

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003

friendship horizon

point at which it becomes impossible to pull/shag your friend because you've become too familiar to each other.

- So how's it going with Sam?
- She farted in front of me today. Twice. I guess we're well over the friendship horizon and into the comfort zone.
- Oh dear.

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003

Crushanator

New word for "munter" or even "minger" (archaic). From the decidedly non-sexy robot in "Futurama."

- Jeeeesus she is a reeal crushanator.
- Nah, she just munts. Mings, you know? Oh... right.

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003

mercyfuck

Fucking someone because you feel deeply sorry for them. Meaning has also extended to include fucking because you feel sorry for yourself. Could be the perfect present for someone trekking the Sahara.

- So you mercyfucked Jody?
- Yeah, she's a munter and I had to have the lights out but she was so damn grateful, it was kinda cute.

by selmabouvier December 18, 2003