rogerthewhale's definitions

Asshole's Advocate

When somebody questions another and takes the opposite viewpoint on a particular subject in a way to provoke thinking, they play devils advocate. Asshole's advocate does the same, but makes himself look like a total fucking asshole.

Devils Advocate:
Jim: The government should really crack down on gun owners. With stricter laws, people would be safer from criminals.

Bob: Then what happens if the government takes away guns, and a criminal comes in with a weapon off the black market. What do you do? I'm just playing devil's advocate.

Asshole's Advocate:
Bill: I think I'll leave college a couple years early. I would be happier pursing my passion for art than I would getting my law degree.

Steve: Then what will you do when somebody says to your face that you're a fucking failure and an art bitch who flunked out of school? Then your shitty art goes nowhere and you can't get a job because you're fucking stupid. I'm just playing devil's advocate.

Bill: You're playing asshole's advocate you judgmental piece of crap.

by rogerthewhale December 13, 2012

Booty

Where peoples' shit comes from. But for some reason, it's still sexy as hell.

Damn! Look at that booty on her.

Yeah, I'll bet she shat out of it this morning, and she probably did a mediocre job of wiping.

Still would bang it!

by rogerthewhale September 15, 2013

Poop Chipper

One who pisses the shit streaks off public toilets for the greater good.

A term made famous by the Collegehumor movie Coffee Town

He's a great guy. I went in there the other day and took a very adult shit. When I walked out, he walked in. I went back in there and all the skid marks... completely gone! That guy... he's a poop chipper.

by rogerthewhale September 1, 2013

Cock fight

The difficult fight a man faces against his cock when a boner is imminent.

Sarah: Your a good friend Joe. I feel so safe and unthreatened with you. (gives him a hug)

Joe thinking: Oh fuck, man. DON'T get a boner! DON'T a boner.

(Joe loses the cock fight; Joe gets a boner; Sarah tazes Joe; Joe says goodbye to plans of getting in Sarah's pants)

by rogerthewhale December 6, 2010

Equator Penis Measuring System

The Equator Penis Measuring System (EPMS) is the system that gives an approximation of one's penis size. Generally speaking, the closer you live to the Ecuador, the larger your penis is. For example, Africans and Latin Americans living on the equator will have penises measuring around 11 or 12 inches hard, while the English and Scottish living up north have penises measuring 3 inches flaccid, or up to 5 inches hard. There are also intermediate points. Italians, for example, have penises about 6 inches flaccid, and 8 inches hard.

Example of the Equator Penis Measuring System

Canadian: Eh, my penis is aboot 3 inches.

Italian: What's a matta you, uh?? I got a 8 inch sausage! It could slap you and break-a your face!!

Black guy: Y'all niggas is small. I got 12 inches up in this muthafucka. Y'all my bitches now. SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!! SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!!

by rogerthewhale March 8, 2013

Love is blind

1. A nice way of saying "Love makes you do fucked up shit."

2. The biggest understatement ever spoken by the masses.

Love is blind.

No. Love is not blind. It's fucking delusional.

by rogerthewhale January 24, 2013

Poondexter

A derivitive of the word poindexter, a poondexter is a geeky male with no friends, but gets a lot of pussy because he will literally fuck anyone, even Sarah Jessica Parker.

Jared: Dude, I totally fucked my girlfriend this weekend. It was AWESOME!

John: DUDE!!! YOU FUCKED FELICIA?!?

Jared: Ha ha. Jealous much?

John: No! I'm not! I swear to god I thought she was a guy for like, a year! You fuckin manwhore poondexter!

by rogerthewhale November 22, 2010