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dj_monged's definitions

paranoia

Having a memory involving something dark and repressed and sweating profusely whilst you wonder just who else knows.

A free floating fear or anxiety that will latch onto just about anything.
Paranoid psychosis, a.k.a. 3 joints too quickly.
by dj_monged August 14, 2004
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Dasani

Dasani is Coca-Cola's bottled water brand that apparently sells well in some markets. By using a new filteration technique similar to that used in cell function or dialysis the water is cleaned and minerals added.

Unfortunately on the UK market the product showed traces of bromate, a carcinogen, and was quickly withdrawn whilst it's original debate, it's oustanding price was still ongoing.

More expensive than many of it's competitors', and since this is just filtered tap water, not a good marketing ploy in a country with potable tap water.

Since other Coca-Cola ingredients such as caffeine, caramel, phosphoric acid and aspartame are seperately linked to issues including brain cancer, memory loss and decalcification of teeth and the fact they already produce Buxton water in a similary industrial enviroment, I'd say their long-term reputation for expensive sugar water and the like will not be harmed.
...and Dasani was quickly withdrawn before the debate and even marketing had really begun.
by dj_monged August 14, 2004
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moof

Use it in the same context as moose, although with the added bonus of sounding acceptable in affection too.
Holy shit, that moof is always pissed.

Ah, poor moof... is there anything you can do without getting hurt?
by dj_monged August 16, 2004
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russian wine

Russian wine is a the rare delicacy produced by mixing vodka with something inappropriate. For example Smirnoff and Redbull is not Russian wine, vodka and beer would be a Russian or a depth-charge and vodka with Mountain Dew would be a form of Russian wine.

Synonymous with jurassic.
Oh man, we were so wasted we were totally mixing vodka and milk again.
by dj_monged August 2, 2004
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Republic

When Gatecrasher was cool, it was called Republic.

Had the funky postcode of S1 1DJ.
Shall we go to Republic? At least the beers cool.
by dj_monged August 8, 2004
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Two C***s in a Kitchen

A genuine technical term used in advertising, often abreviated to "two c's in a kitchen". This unbeleivably offensive term relates to any advert based around two people discussing something for the purpose of a camera.

The origins of this are based in early washing powder comercials where two people would say something like "Oh, how do you get those whites so bright?". Apparently even in the early days people found it hard to keep a straight face on set.

Now there are several pastiches, including two c's by a washing line, two c's in a bar, in a car, anywhere.

In short, two people discussing something pointlessly and in an artificial or clearly staged manner for the benefit of onlookers, sometimes in irony.
Dude, I just had to sit through a party political broadcast with a staged interview. It was so totally two c's.
by dj_monged August 14, 2004
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Calvin and Hobbes

Kickass monster fixated, transmorgifier time travel machine, boy and imaginary tuna-loving tiger adventures with most excellent art from Bill Waterson's brain.
"You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help."
-Calvin
by dj_monged September 2, 2004
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