one-eyed willy

A mans penis.

"He pulled out his one-eyed willy and used it on his girlfriend."

by the boss-86001 December 18, 2016

one-eyed willy

A Goonies favorite. This is when you cum in a girl's eye, kick her in the shin, and run away as if you set off a series of booby traps. The desired effect is to get her hopping on one leg while holding the other, and covering one of her eyes with her free hand. Resembling the famous pirate (or Mama Fratelli if she's fat). Arrgh!

Last night at the frat party, this girl was so drunk and fugly, I ended up one-eyed willying her.

by PoloSportCondoms.com June 7, 2005

one-eyed willie

1) Euphemism for a penis, where "one-eyed" refers to the external urethral orifice (or pee-hole) located at the tip of the penis' head.
2) One-eyed willy, both alternate spelling and definition.
Expression's origins: derived from the name popular character from the film "Goonies" (although this context has been permutated with time). See also dong, dick, schlong, willy, wang, johnson, cock.

I have six beers, and next thing I know, I'm staring into the eye of Jake's one-eyed willie.

by Jenn F September 8, 2005

One Eyed Willy

Penis

A One Eyed Willy always looks better circumcised

by Bungalow Bill October 18, 2001

One-Eyed Willy

When a man is lying on his back while the woman is jerking him off in the dark, as he's about to shoot his load, he leans up and she (intentionally or unintentionally) aims his "one-eyed peg leg" at his eye. When the cum hits his eye, he grabs it, and yells, ARRRRRRGGHHHHH....

I thought that I would be mad that my old lady gave me a one-eyed willy last night, but after measuring the distance..."I'M THE MAN!!!!!"

by Times Square Karl June 10, 2006

One eyed Willy

When a girl is so turned on during sex that she begs you to cum inside her. After she gets off, she’s mad because she has to go get that plan B, so she punches you in the eye.

Damn dude, my girl gave me a one eyed Willy last night.

by jimmydimmydingdong April 23, 2020

One Eyed Willy's Eye Patch

a prophylactic or condom; jimmy hat.
(AKA, Gonad Goggles, Spunk or Splooge Spittoon, Pricknic Basket, or Uterus Excluderous)

Have to go to the pharmacy and pick up a couple of boxes of One-Eyed Willy's Eyepatches...remember, two nuts driving a hot rod should always wear a helmet!

by weave March 25, 2003