wouldaben's definitions

sylph

the epitome of slim, prepubescent, female beauty.

Ballerinas strive for their bodies to be like that of a sylph - thin to the point that they appear lighter than air.

by wouldaben December 16, 2010

diet shivers

shivers caused by a woman's coldness due to her dieting (restricting her calorie intake to lose weight and/or become thinner). Dieting causes the metabolism to slow and therefore generate less heat, causing the dieter to shiver to keep warm.

Though the night was 80 degrees Fahrenheit, the model had diet shivers because she had been fasting for two days in preparation for a photo-shoot.

by wouldaben January 6, 2011

Panty Canopy

the phenomenon among thin women of the fronts of their panties not touching their lower abdomens. This phenomenon is best achieved when the woman is lying on her back. The front of the panty is held up and away from her concave lower abdomen by her hip bones and the bulge of her vulva/pubic mound. Panty canopies are considered attractive by many not only because they demonstrate the thinness of the woman but, when viewed from the proper angle, provide a view of the top of the woman's vulva/pubic mound. (See also panty bridge, which is a subset of the panty canopy.)

That model is showing off how thin she is by lying down, sucking in her already tiny abdomen, and creating a panty canopy so deep that a train could drive under it.

by wouldaben December 16, 2010

vulva-print

the pattern that a vulva makes when pressed against a surface. As each fingerprint is unique, so is each vulva-print.

The police officer was able to identify the suspect at the crime scene (a nude swimming pool for super-models) based solely on her vulva-print. The quick-thinking officer took a picture of the water-mark the suspect's vulva made against a bench at the swimming pool before it dried in the hot sun. After taking the vulva-print of each super-model at the pool using a soft clay mold pressed gently, yet firmly, against her vulva, the suspect (who had a glabrous, well-defined labia-majora and a trim labia-minora with crinkles at the edges reminiscent of orchid's petals) was identified.

by wouldaben December 13, 2010

model-thin

As thin as a model, particularly a runway/catwalk model. Very thin with essentially no visible fat. Abdomen is either flat or concave. Hip bones and the lower edges of the rib cage rise above the valley of the abdomen created between them. Real breasts are not present (or at least prominent) as breasts are filled with fat that has been stripped away by calorie deprivation. Small breast "buds," comparable to those of slim girls in the earliest stages of puberty, may be present. Artificial breasts are often present as they are composed of materials that cannot be digested to support metabolism, and the modeling industry seems to prefer them. Cheeks are concave and cheek-bones are prominent. Thighs are not much, if any, thicker than the calves. When the model stands with her feet together, her thighs do not touch each other and she creates the approximation of a one-dimensional line protruding perpendicular to the plane of the floor.

I understand that in order to be model-thin, women must endure constant hunger, hunger-headaches, coldness, frequent colds/flu, and often abuse drugs such as cocaine and cigarettes. Even when they have little body fat, they use laxatives and enemas to minimize their waists. Some force themselves to vomit food they have unintentionally eaten. None the less, I am ashamed to admit that I am enthralled with the sylphic beauty of women who are model thin. I have tried for two decades to ignore or change this attraction, but I cannot shake it.

by wouldaben December 13, 2010

beknighted

adjective used to describe people who speak as though they have royal (i.e. "knighted") authority. Important or authoritative but almost always used in a mocking or sarcastic sense.

Patient to Doctor: "I have been taking the same medications at the same dosages for the last ten years. I am not interested in paying $200 for a slip of paper that says, in your beknighted opinion, that I can continue to take them. That is simply the doctor's monopoly taxing pharmaceutical sales."

It is Sarah Palin's beknighted conclusion that climate change is a fiction. Next she'll be telling us she's an expert in quantum computing.

by wouldaben December 18, 2010

Panty Bridge

the phenomenon on a thin woman of the waist-band of her panties being suspended between her hip bones without touching her concave lower abdomen. This phenomenon is best achieved when the woman is lying on her back. Panty bridges are considered attractive by many not only because they demonstrate the thinness of the woman but, when viewed from the proper angle, provide a view of the top of the woman's vulva/pubic mound.

That model is showing off how thin she is by lying down, sucking in her already tiny abdomen, and creating a panty bridge so deep that a train could drive under it.

by wouldaben December 16, 2010