wouldaben's definitions
a pathological disorder in which one is sexually aroused by the idea of a woman trying to reduce her weight, size, or adiposity for purely aesthetic reasons. No sexual arousal occurs if an obese woman attempts to reduce, but if a woman who is already slender expresses a desire to reduce simply to increase her sexual appeal, arousal is triggered. In addition, the motivation for her weight loss must be her enthusiasm at the prospect of becoming even more sexy, not dread or self-hatred.
I only exhibit diet-philia in the abstract; when I deal with actual women in real life, I want them to be healthy, happy, comfortable, and in constant sexual ecstasy. But I still find slim women the most attractive. I just don't want them to have to suffer to be slim.
by wouldaben December 13, 2010
Get the diet-philia mug.a combination of the words "vulva" and "voracious" suggesting one who is hungry for vulva. Describes one who greatly desires to perform cunnilingus or other oral stimulation of the vulva.
I was vulvoracious after watching that hot model wearing lingerie; I wanted to pull down her panties, surround her vulva in my mouth, and lick her to orgasm right then and there.
by wouldaben January 6, 2011
Get the vulvoracious mug.fear of interacting with an unemployed person for fear that whatever caused him or her to be unemployed will transfer to you. Originally used by John Stewart on the Daily Show.
After I lost my job, all of my "friends" suddenly became too busy to spend time with me. I guess I have unemployment cooties.
by wouldaben January 4, 2011
Get the Unemployment Cooties mug.a combination of the words "perfectionist" and "anorexic." Someone, usually male, who cannot imagine being attracted to woman whose lower abdomen is convex or whose body has adipose tissue that disturbs the continuity of her lines.
You can call me shallow, but if sex is the only activity that is not allowed outside a committed relationship, then I'm going to make sexual attraction my first priority in a partner; in my case, that makes me a perfrexionist.
by wouldaben December 19, 2010
Get the perfrexionist mug.the pattern that a vulva makes when pressed against a surface. As each fingerprint is unique, so is each pussy-print.
The police officer was able to identify the suspect at the crime scene (a nude swimming pool for super-models) based solely on her pussy-print. The quick-thinking officer took a picture of the water-mark the suspect's vulva made against a bench at the swimming pool before it dried in the hot sun. After taking the pussy-print of each super-model at the pool using a soft clay mold pressed gently, yet firmly, against her vulva, the suspect (who had a glabrous, well-defined labia-majora and a trim labia-minora with crinkles at the edges reminiscent of orchid's petals) was identified.
by wouldaben December 19, 2010
Get the pussy-print mug.a covert communication device inserted in the vagina of a secret-agent or sexy spy. The earliest model, developed by the Brazilians, could only send an out-going message encoded by the secret-agent squeezing her vagina in Morse-code, which was then converted the Kegal contractions into radio signals. The advantage of the device was that it was unlikely to be found even after a thorough frisking or even a strip-search. In the event it was found, the secret-agent could merely explain that she was having her period (as the device looked like an ordinary tampon with the string serving as the antenna). The Ukrainians created an improved version of the device that could receive and convey incoming messages as well. The incoming message, also in Morse-code, was translated into vibrations that corresponded to the dots and dashes. While effective as a communication device, the Ukrainian device suffered from the draw-back that it tended to cause intense orgasms in the secret-agents and, as the tampon could not absorb all the natural orgasmic lubricant due to its being filled with electronic gadgetry, the orgasmic fluid would often carry the tampon-transponder out into the panties of the secret agent, and she would have improvise a hasty trip to the lady's room to reinsert the device before she could resume communication.
The tampon-transponder was used by super-models because spy agencies believed that the thinnest women had the tightest vaginas and would therefore be best able to squeeze the transponders with their vaginas to generate out-going messages.
by wouldaben December 13, 2010
Get the tampon-transponder mug.adjective used to describe people who speak as though they have royal (i.e. "knighted") authority. Important or authoritative but almost always used in a mocking or sarcastic sense.
Patient to Doctor: "I have been taking the same medications at the same dosages for the last ten years. I am not interested in paying $200 for a slip of paper that says, in your beknighted opinion, that I can continue to take them. That is simply the doctor's monopoly taxing pharmaceutical sales."
It is Sarah Palin's beknighted conclusion that climate change is a fiction. Next she'll be telling us she's an expert in quantum computing.
It is Sarah Palin's beknighted conclusion that climate change is a fiction. Next she'll be telling us she's an expert in quantum computing.
by wouldaben December 18, 2010
Get the beknighted mug.