12 definitions by mockschmock
Monica - "Hey Chandler, have you picked up your dirty underpants off the kitchen floor yet, you rancid fart?"
Chandler - "Syft, Whore."
Excerpt from "The One Where Chandler And Monica Have A Row But Make Up By The End"
Chandler - "Syft, Whore."
Excerpt from "The One Where Chandler And Monica Have A Row But Make Up By The End"
by mockschmock December 13, 2006
a door darkener who wants to spread the dubious good news about Jehovah, but doesn't have enough mental processing power to sustain an argument about it.
I just had a jehovah's twitness at the door - he was thick as pig shit and twice as smelly so I slammed the door on him.
by mockschmock December 12, 2006
Mrs Tiggywinkle? It's PC Bobs, here. I'm afraid I have some upsetting news. Your husband was crossing the M4 and, well I'm afraid he bought the farm. Squashed flatter than a witch's tit. He was.
We scraped Him up as best we could. He's in this bucket. I shouldn't look if I were you.
We scraped Him up as best we could. He's in this bucket. I shouldn't look if I were you.
by mockschmock December 12, 2006
Violent, unpredictable and rather unpleasant bout of "Delhi Belly".
Sudden, malodorous and disconcerting onset of liquifaction of one's latest meal.
Sudden, malodorous and disconcerting onset of liquifaction of one's latest meal.
"We'd best leave now, sir, you have a bad case of galloping gut rot."
"I know, but let me just sign this treaty, first."
(PM Tony Blair to President Bush, Circa 2004)
"I know, but let me just sign this treaty, first."
(PM Tony Blair to President Bush, Circa 2004)
by mockschmock December 7, 2006
Oh buggering arseholes, I've sent the porn subscription to Aunt Mabel and the get well soon card to Paul Raymond Publishing.
by mockschmock December 12, 2006
Expression of surprise, quite long but effective at getting all the surprisedness out in one breath. For 'ragman' think Steptoe/Sanford & Son. Aha.
'Well fuck me with a ragman's trumpet. There IS a Santa.'
by mockschmock December 8, 2006
In Devon (West of England), an idle, slow and incompetent person who is no use to man nor beast. Just like a slack fanny (whether British or American), someone who does a poor job of whatever they are meant to be doing.
by mockschmock December 8, 2006