giraffe-o's definitions

newscandy

Insufficient morsels of news meted out by journalists of TV and radio. Often simply a headline and one paragraph's worth word-count, so that they can pile on as many little anecdotes as possible between traffic reports, witty banter, and advertisements, and repeat them every half hour for the short-attention span crowd.

Watching CNN Headline News is pretty much just getting newscandy.

by giraffe-o May 18, 2006

tapping the admiral

sneaking a furtive, illicit alcoholic drink. The term stems from the case of British Admiral Nelson, whose corpse was pickled, in brandy, after dying at sea & sparked rumours that his men would drink from the barrell.

"We have a meeting with the boss this morning, wait until the afternoon before tapping the admiral"

by giraffe-o January 12, 2009

texas grandparent

Someone who is expendable in a crisis, who can be sacrificed for the greater good. Based on the request from Texas Republicans to let old people die, during the 2020 COVID-19 crisis, so young people can go back to work.

“If we have an apocalypse, I’m throwing you to the zombies like a Texas grandparent.”

by giraffe-o March 25, 2020

roadtrip leapfrog

On a driving trip - continually passing or getting passed by the same cars.

I limit the pitstops I take when I'm on a long drive, so I don't have to keep playing roadtrip leapfrog with the same douchebag drivers.

by giraffe-o September 2, 2014

ham sandwich

slang in police lexicon, meaning an untainted handgun a corrupt cop will have ready to plant on a suspect they've shot. Prevalent in New Orleans culture, during the militant state in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. (seen on PBS' Frontline)

My partner used to carry around a ham sandwich to pin on some poor fucker they might shoot down.

by giraffe-o August 26, 2010

million dollar strong

Being exceptionally assured and confident, in one's interpersonal relationships with the opposite sex (used particularly in hip-hop culture).

Ever since my baby-momma backed down on that domestic assault charge, we been million dollar strong.

by giraffe-o November 14, 2013

blackswan

To be engaged in sexual contact with your partner, from behind, in a swimming pool, then forcing their head underwater which each thrust. (this mimics the actual mating habits of swans)

I got so carried away when I was hitting that in the hotel swimming pool last night, I started to blackswan her.

by giraffe-o July 7, 2011