10 definitions by floorfly
1. A born again birth control user who excessively claims to be using natural birth control method; and gives TMI about her cycle, her sex life, and her religious beliefs.
2. The natural methodist method is based on a trinity of ideas overshadowed by one all encompassing truth. Firstly, that women ovulate 14 days before menstruation begins, give or take two days. Secondly, that sperm can survive inside a woman for three days. That an egg can only be fertilized within 24 hours of being released from the ovaries.
And lastly, that anyone at work gives a shit.
2. The natural methodist method is based on a trinity of ideas overshadowed by one all encompassing truth. Firstly, that women ovulate 14 days before menstruation begins, give or take two days. Secondly, that sperm can survive inside a woman for three days. That an egg can only be fertilized within 24 hours of being released from the ovaries.
And lastly, that anyone at work gives a shit.
She's a total Natural Methodist; she would have never made it through high school or technical school if she really was using the the rhythm method. I can't eat hard boiled eggs anymore since she told me when she ovulates.
by floorfly November 19, 2010
by floorfly November 13, 2010
Phrase used after one inadvertently says something that sounds like a natural or homeopathic cure, without intending to be aggressively granola.
by floorfly November 11, 2010
A man you encourage your daughter to date, wed, or procreate with so you have a hedge fund for your non existent social security. Also known as "Fat F@#$%." Guys that have no other redeeming quality than a paycheck. Also see
"Mr. Collins" from Pride & Prejudice.
"Mr. Collins" from Pride & Prejudice.
I used to be worried about my retirement, until my daughter
found her new hedge hog on e-harmony.
I don't know what I would do without my hedge hog fund... I am so glad I decided to procreate when I was 16, now I can retire at 35.
found her new hedge hog on e-harmony.
I don't know what I would do without my hedge hog fund... I am so glad I decided to procreate when I was 16, now I can retire at 35.
by floorfly November 30, 2010
Joe never gets a latte on coffee runs or goes to happy hour; he has fun infertility, he's got to pay child support on all 5 of those kids.
by floorfly November 13, 2010
I find Pill-Lattes helps me stay mentally in shape. I take one one skinny sugar free vanilla no foam latte with a hydrocodone then drop the kids off at school, and then I go to book club or the Y until its time to pick the kids back up.
by floorfly November 13, 2010
1. When someone claims to be "Christrian" but has never been in a church and has a vague recollection of the ten commandments, but thinks they are good person.
2. In religion, the lowest common denominator or least common denominator (abbreviated LCD) is the least common multiple of the denomination of a set of vulgar religions. It is the smallest common thought that is a multiple of the denominations.
2. In religion, the lowest common denominator or least common denominator (abbreviated LCD) is the least common multiple of the denomination of a set of vulgar religions. It is the smallest common thought that is a multiple of the denominations.
by floorfly November 13, 2010