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chesterpest's definitions

babies breakfasts

Alternative name for iladies breasts. Also known as ladylumps, mezulas, tatties, puppies, waps, tonkas, bullwinkles noses, tits, paps, threps, jugs, melons, funbags, etc
Gary had never imagined that a woman could cultivate such an award winning set of 'babies breakfasts', pity it was his sister.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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frankenstool

A lumpy deformed turd making its appearance after a gruelling period of constipation and often consisting of several layered and compacted hard mini turds.
'That laxative certainly did the trick' exclaimed paul, 'but I appear to have given birth to an enormous frankenstool in the process'!
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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two shakes of a chimps cock

To be there in a minute. The full version of 'there in two shakes'.
'I'll be there in two shakes of a chimps cock Vera', shouted Mavis before grabbing her coat, rushing to the front door and setting off for a good night at the bingo.
by chesterpest January 22, 2010
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chipolinks

a stream of small hard conjoined pebble-like turds derived from 'chipolata' and 'links'
Simon had clearly been constipated for some time, this much was evident upon examination of his recently laid 'chipolinks'.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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Jazz crooner

An elderly readers wife who makes regular appearances in the pages of a top shelf Jazz Mag.
'Has anyone seen my April edition of 'MILF times', there's a Jazz crooner on page 42 that looks just like Mavis from accounts?'
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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liquid kosh

Alternative name for Stella Artois premium strength lager. Also known as wife beater. Refers to the after effects suffered from a night on the lash.
The morning after his 'liquid kosh' fueled binge Dave lost all feeling in his legs and went blind in one eye - 'Result' he declared.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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special dispensation

When you are allowed out with the lads for a 'heavy lashing' due to exceptional circumstances which can't be refused (eg Wetting the babies head, Stag Do etc). Also commonly referred to as a '24 hour pass'.
'But love, its Barry's stag do, I can't not go - you've got to give me special dispensation!!', 'hmmmmm, this is the seventh stag do that Barry's had in 3 months' murmured Tracy suspiciously.
by chesterpest January 22, 2010
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