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chesterpest's definitions

chipolinks

a stream of small hard conjoined pebble-like turds derived from 'chipolata' and 'links'
Simon had clearly been constipated for some time, this much was evident upon examination of his recently laid 'chipolinks'.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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frankenstool

A lumpy deformed turd making its appearance after a gruelling period of constipation and often consisting of several layered and compacted hard mini turds.
'That laxative certainly did the trick' exclaimed paul, 'but I appear to have given birth to an enormous frankenstool in the process'!
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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cumberlodge

a turd so long and unbroken when dispatched that it refuses to leave the bowl, even after several flushes.
'Dad!' cried little Jimmy, 'We've got a cumberlodge'. 'Don't worry son, i'll get my walking stick and we'll break it up a bit first'.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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Jazz crooner

An elderly readers wife who makes regular appearances in the pages of a top shelf Jazz Mag.
'Has anyone seen my April edition of 'MILF times', there's a Jazz crooner on page 42 that looks just like Mavis from accounts?'
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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liquid kosh

Alternative name for Stella Artois premium strength lager. Also known as wife beater. Refers to the after effects suffered from a night on the lash.
The morning after his 'liquid kosh' fueled binge Dave lost all feeling in his legs and went blind in one eye - 'Result' he declared.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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babies breakfasts

Alternative name for iladies breasts. Also known as ladylumps, mezulas, tatties, puppies, waps, tonkas, bullwinkles noses, tits, paps, threps, jugs, melons, funbags, etc
Gary had never imagined that a woman could cultivate such an award winning set of 'babies breakfasts', pity it was his sister.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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threps

Womens breasts. Abbr: originating from the cockney rhyming slang 'Threpenny Bits' (tits).
The lads decided another trip down to Margate was in order - in the height of summer it was always guaranteed that there would be plenty of 'threps' on show.
by chesterpest January 17, 2010
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