29 definitions by PaulAllensCard
(Sex act) While performing oral sex on a woman, the tongue manipulates the clitoris like a joystick moving up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right- the same directional commands used in the infamous "99 lives" cheat in the old 80's Nintendo game Contra. Since the same cheat works in the classic Castlevania, this could also be referred to as The Castlevania Code, or even "Contralingus".
"I had my face in her crotch for a good ten minutes, but once I entered the Contra Code she squirted so hard I saw it arc right over my shoulder"
by PaulAllensCard January 30, 2015
A private space for discreet masturbation created by draping sheets over the lower bunk of a bunk bed, usually in a communal living situation like county jail or band camp.
by PaulAllensCard January 30, 2015
by PaulAllensCard August 31, 2015
The three-way shot of ejaculate from a pierced penis without the ring, creating a fountain-like eruption of semen.
Could also be called the Yogurt Shotgun, Tapioca Sprinkler or Spread Shot
Could also be called the Yogurt Shotgun, Tapioca Sprinkler or Spread Shot
by PaulAllensCard February 3, 2015
by PaulAllensCard February 6, 2015
When you sit on someone else's pillow and blow a hot, rancid fart into it as you slowly raise your ass off it to create a sponge effect that will trap the smell inside. Later when that person goes to bed and presses their head into the pillow, the stale fart is ejected right into their face.
My mother-in-law is staying in the guest room, so I made sure to leave a cocoa puff in both pillows.
by PaulAllensCard January 30, 2015
An unused condom that has been tucked away in a wallet for so long that it's actually fused with the leather, and must be carbon dated to determine the era in which it was intended for use. A wallet fossil should not be discarded as it may be worth money on the collector's market, or at least holds value as nostalgia for the days you still held out some hope for pussy.
"The date had not gone well, and Laura felt an awesome wave of relief when their waiter finally appeared with the check. As Chad took out his Harley-Davidson wallet to pay, Laura noticed a scuffy ring-shaped extrusion on it that can only be produced by a long forgotten wallet fossil. Suddenly it all made sense to her."
by PaulAllensCard January 31, 2015