Fearman's definitions

skin job

Derogatory term for replicant or android used in the 1982 Ridley Scott movie "Blade Runner", starring Harrison Ford and Rutger Hauer, based on the novel "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?", by Philip K. Dick. Think of all the mean-spirited epithets humans have ever flung at each other all rolled into one.

You've still got to waste four more skin jobs, Deckard.

by Fearman October 31, 2007

moonspin

Something utterly ridiculous, ludicrous and otherwise beyond the pale, thought up either by someone blotto out of their mind trying to make their way home on a moonlit night, or someone impersonating them.

She's trying to give me the same old moonspin about how she couldn't help it, the bottle of Jack Daniels just jumped on her.

More of this moonspin about Creationism and that on the telly.

by Fearman January 15, 2008

klingons on the starboard bow

Expression used as a warning by person 1 when someone known mutually to 1 and 2, whom 2 does not wish to meet, comes into view. Don't Look Now, but ..., From a more literal usage in the original series of Star Trek.

Joe: I don't want to meet the Wirrals tonight, okay?
Mike (looking over Joe's shoulder): Umm ... Klingons on the starboard bow.
Joe: They're HERE?! Get me out of here.
Mike: Right this way ...,

by Fearman August 13, 2007

Chthulhu

Vast entity seeking to re-enter the stream of terrestrial time-space, as revealed in the visionary works of H. P. Lovecraft. Gibbous, vast, eldritch, gibbering, and infinitely rebulbulous in his extra-terrestrial physics and non-Euclidean geometry. His feelers extend to all the best dinner parties where the unsuspecting taste him in the wine, rip off their clothes and expose the darkest secrets of their splenetic nightmares. The best friend of necrotic occultists everywhere. His friends all call him "Percy". Will sign copies of the Necronomicon for free, with heart-felt dedications ... if you dare look him in his extra-cosmic face.

Chthulhu ... the master of ectopic time.

by Fearman August 31, 2007

sloe gin

Alcoholic beverage made by flavouring gin with the juices of sloes, the fruit of the blackthorn bush. The berries are picked traditionally in October to November, although global warming is edging this back into September. The best stuff is a deep shadowy red and tastes like a mixture of woodsmoke, sugar, fire, and something more sublime again. If you want the genuine article, make it yourself.

Good homemade sloe gin is the nectar of the gods.

by Fearman January 6, 2008

death

Nature's way of reminding you that health foods don't work.

She had a lovely death, up to her eyeballs in water biscuits and cucumber sandwiches.

by Fearman July 6, 2007

Roger Moore

In the Bond franchise, the equivalent of one of those Chinese dinners. You'll want to watch his movies again and again ... and ten minutes after the end credits, you'll wonder why. How he managed to swing a record seven Bond movies is one of the universe's most arcane mysteries. The only Bond actor who could have made Richard Kiel's "Jaws" look good. Christopher Walken gave him one wrinkle too many in his last Bond outing, and Moore was mercifully retired.
On the plus side, he won quadruple gold in the 1952 Olympic Games ... in that sadly forgotten event, the eyebrow-raise.

Good evening, darling. The name's Moore. Roger Moore. I hear you throw pots. (Looks down lewdly and VERY obviously, glimpse of his pearly teeth, eyebrows raised). Ah, yes, and you have two gorgeous jugs as well. Shall we dine at the Ritz, my dear?

by Fearman August 4, 2007