Croatalin's definitions

Toe Rag

Although usually used as a description of an unpleasant, obnoxious twit or the foot wrappings used in place of socks, it is also used to described dried, salted cod because of its strong unpleasant smell. By extension it was also used to describe other things with a strong unpleasant fishy smell.

Dave, I heard you dumped Millie, I thought you were going to give her one.
Nah! I got her clouts off and her min smelled like a load of old toe rag so I left it.

by Croatalin October 28, 2013

Whack Job

There are a number of definitions to this phrase, two of the commonest being:

1) A person who exhibits abnormal behaviour, this can vary from mild eccentricity to full-blown, froth at the mouth insanity. The degree to which the person is a whack job is usually given by qualifiers to the phrase. Mild eccentricity would be indicated by saying the person was 'a bit of a whack job' stronger symptoms of eccentricity and the person would be 'a proper whack job'. If the person was seriously insane then they would be 'a total, out-and-out, raving whack job'.

2) A professional killing, also known as a hit. The whack part comes from the victim being killed (whacked), the job from the fact that this is done for payment by a professional (it's his or her job).

1) Jackson Galaxy is a bit of a whack job, but he knows a hell of a lot about cats (he's not bad on guitar either).

2) Spanner was found dead in his flat, looks like it was a whack job!

by Croatalin January 10, 2014

graveyard fuck

This is where a male person has sex with a woman of advanced age, quite literally old enough to be his granny. There is no love involved, it is usually done for a bet or some other reason. If the woman is rich or a celebrity, the male becomes known as a 'toy-boy'. If a woman indulges in a graveyard fuck, it's invariably with a man who is rich and powerful and she expects marriage to result. She's in it purely for the money so I suppose that makes her a whore and therefore it's not really a graveyard fuck..

Look at that old bat blowin' kisses at Jed!
Well, that's what happens when you get pissed and have a graveyard fuck.

by Croatalin February 19, 2014

Cunt

There are a number of different ways in which this word can be used, besides being an informal name for female genitalia*, it can be used in at least two other ways:

1) A derogatory name for a person you intensely dislike;
2) As an acronym standing variously for Computer User Non-Technical, Cannot Understand New Technology, Cannot Utilise Normal Thinking.
No doubt there are others as well, but those mentioned here all share a common theme in that the person described is a bit of a twat.

*For some reason this is now perceived to be offensive, but during the Middle Ages in Britain it was a word in common use indeed, it still remains in some street names e.g. Gropecunt Lane.

"Malcolm's ballsed up his computer again and doesn't know why."
"He really is a cunt!"

by Croatalin December 4, 2013

Anosmia

Anosmia means having no sense of smell. If you have anosmia, you can't smell flowers, perfume, or home cooking, which can lead to sufferers becoming intensely depressed. There could be some advantages; when some diseased arsehole lets go a really poisonous fart you won't smell it, even though everyone else has tears in their eyes from trying not to puke. Similarly if you are stuck in a boring lecture next to someone whose BO is blistering the paintwork and has everyone else thinking that there's a malfunction in the sewage works you won't be bothered. On the whole, though, anosmia is pretty shit.

Malcolm suffers from anosmia, he must do, otherwise how does he live with himself?

by Croatalin January 27, 2014

Lunting

The British meaning of 'lunting' is to walk whilst smoking a pipe. Lunting is used by pipe smokers as a means of relaxation or easing stress. In addition Lunting can also mean emitting smoke or steam or the act of lighting a fire, torch or tobacco pipe.

Dating from around 1540 - 1550, the origin is believed to be from the Dutch word 'lont' meaning a slow match or fuse or possibly the Middle Low German 'lonte' meaning a wick.

"Sod this for a game of soldiers, I'm takin' me pipe and going lunting!"

by Croatalin December 4, 2013

Charlie

A breast, boob or tit. Although found in the singular form it is most frequently used as a plural, Charlies.

"Look at the Charlies on that!"
"Well, we'd just finished bonking and I was lying on me back at peace with the world and she turned over quick and I got a charlie right in the chops!"

by Croatalin September 8, 2013