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pasturbating 

Masturbating to something good that has happened to you or a friend in the past.
1. "Dude, do you remember that one time I got laid?" "Yeah, I'm pasturbating right now!"
2. "Pasturbation really is the best, especially if it happened to you!"
pasturbating by Xaneth April 4, 2014

plansturbating 

To over-complicate a situation through excessive or unnecessary planning, to the point that progress or enjoyment is hindered
1. We would already be halfway through with this project if the business would stop plansturbating and just let us work.
2. Family vacations are more work than fun because of all of Mom's plansturbating.

pansturbating 

A chick so loose, she needs a pan to get off.
"Bitch you so wide, I see you pansturbating in the pantry."
pansturbating by Egg Pail February 17, 2024

Paturbating 

Paturbating is when you masturbate, and look cool while doing it, usually wearing black sunglasses and a leather jacket, with a very straight face.
I'm gonna try paturbating at the mall tomorrow, I just got a new leather jacket
Paturbating by Professor S1gmus September 1, 2013

Painsturbating 

Verb;
The act of masturbating to something that is inflicting pain on you.

Verb(2):
When you masturbated so many times during the day that it starts to hurt.
Dude , i started painsturbating when she was whipping me with her strap-on

Mate, I've masturbated so many times today that its gotten to the point that I'm painsturbating

plantsturbating

When your combination of rare mental genius requires that you tend to plants to calm your mind, and you can spend hours creatively attending to and nourishing your plant children. It is technically a time waster, but feels self soothing. This only applies to plant lovers for whom the death of a plant is like the loss of a friend; love of plants required.
Omg my anxiety was off the charts, so I spent FIVE HOURS on Saturday plantsturbating and repotting my succulent collection
plantsturbating by ReXXXfromATX August 16, 2022