17 definitions by mattpacer

chocolate mr whippy

A long stream of light airy shit

I couldn't stop, it was like chocolate mr whippy

by mattpacer May 16, 2016

mummy fisting

When a girl is so dry it is like trying to fist a mummified corpse.

Jake: So what happened last night with that bird?
James: nothing good, all I got was an aching arm after mummy fisting for 5 minutes

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

i just know, okay

How to explain away a lack of evidence or facts to back up the shit you are spouting.

Simon: that new girl would definitely rather fuck me than you.
Dan: what's that based on then?
Simon: I just know, okay

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

cock fried

When you have so much sex your dick feels like it has been deep fried.

omg last night Stacy was crazy, she wouldn't quit. I'm totally cock fried

by mattpacer May 16, 2016

ass smudge

When an offensively fat individual sits down on the toilet, misses the centre and leaves a gross shit stain on the back edge of the toilet seat.

Timmy: I swear if Simon leaves one more ass smudge on the toilet seat I'm going to flip.
Craig: Man he can't help it, he huge.

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

mike wong

The stereotypical Chinese American.

Cindy: hey, who's that new guy? He's cute.
Lisa: I don't know, just some Mike Wong

by mattpacer May 15, 2016

cunt sandwich

Middle lane cunt surrounded on either side by people who know how to drive

Simon was cruising down the motorway, ahead he can see a car in the middle lane with the slow lane completely empty .He sees a silver lupo aggressively on its tail and moving towards the inside lane to undercut. So Simon had no choice but to take the outer lane and cunt sandwich the fuck outa the wanker in the middle lane .

by mattpacer May 15, 2016