12 definitions by masochistmonkeyjoe

n: sunglasses; esp. when worn at night and/or by a goth person.
Aren't Lady Skulltits' nightshades frightfully divine?

I wear my nightshades at night so I can so I can...
by masochistmonkeyjoe June 15, 2011
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a combination of "fap" and "nightmare". a revolting/unsexy thought or situation that prevents you from being able to fap/achieve an erection/orgasm
Mike usually found some alone time while his wife was at work, but the fat,dead homeless man that he found in his computer room this morning was such a fapmare that he could never spank it in there ever again.
by masochistmonkeyjoe April 23, 2009
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Someone who lets everyone else cum on them. (not necessarily at one time. that would be bukkake )
Your mom is the cumbrella of Eastern Idaho.

Your dad is the cumbrella of Walla Walla, Washington.

Your sister is the cumbrella of the Martin Van Buren High School varsity football team.
by masochistmonkeyjoe March 17, 2007
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this is a level of excitation that results in folks shitting their pants.

it is generally a hyperbole/exaggeration in that one does not ACTUALLY shit in their pants.
Bobby was shitpants excited over his date with his hot slutty cousin that night.

Tina always gets shitpants excited when she hears about a new family guy episode on TV.
by masochistmonkeyjoe March 19, 2010
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this is a type of oral sex in which the performer keeps the penis in their throat during orgasm and gargles the semen around the end of the penis
Well, Mr. McDonald, if you want a garglejob you'll have to pay extra. I usually have to drink a whole 6 pack to clean all of the ejaculatory fluid out of my throat.
by masochistmonkeyjoe October 14, 2008
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a term in the gay community (not widely used as I invented it myself). It refers to a fellow with a very small, round, and tight "he-hole".
He's a virgin! He's just GOTTA be a cheerio boy! ... .. unlike YOUR slutty, stretched out dried out ol' ass!
by masochistmonkeyjoe January 15, 2007
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v. to strap a dildo to your head (like the horn of a unicorn) and to screw someone IN THE ASS (the cornhole)
Jim screwnicornholed Patsy up against the front door until she was screaming like a banshee.

After screwnicornholing Michael, Dawn had to wash the fudge and corn off of her headgear.
by masochistmonkeyjoe June 15, 2007
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