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honneamise's definitions

JSM

JSM or Job Security Measure is used by IT professionals everywhere to ensure they don't become irrelevant. It was made famous by a particular IT professional in the late 80s when he foresaw the coming Cloud and realised the only way forward was to become extremely relevant. His resulting piece of work, JSM for People Who Haven't Got A. Clue, is the defining document on how to avoid becoming irrelevant. Many IT professionals the world over, with no time to waste investing in training and certification have often found this book on JSM to be the way out of being intelligent
That was a terrific JSM you deployed on the network, very smart.
My boss used a JSM to shore up the next three years of his career, very impressive work
Every time I hear someone has used a JSM, I want to find them, dunk them in a vat of oil, torch them till there is nothing left, then feed there JSM fuelled remains to a flock of seagulls high on acid
by honneamise March 9, 2020
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nerdaism

Nerdaism is the religion of Nerds. It was recently formed by Nerds to formalise their belief that the world will be saved by Nerds when the Nerdocalypse happens. the Nerdocalypse is similar to the Rapture, except Nerds will appear everywhere all of a sudden quoting Linux commands and sprouting off about "the command line is power", when in actual fact normals (people who arent Nerds) simply want to go about their business, like going to the coffee shop and swimming. Fortunately for normals, the Nerdocalypse will simply produce a lot of Nerds, and normals will have no problem sweeping them aside, as Nerds are weak and pathetic.
Nerdaism is a great religion
If you are a Nerdasim member, you shoul die from a terminal disease
by honneamise December 18, 2018
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IPv6

IPv6 or In the Penis Virgin 6, is a band of religious nut cases who thought they would invent an internet protocol, but came up with IPv6 instead. In the Penis Virgin 4 was the last one and it is entirely shit, but In the Penis Virgin 6 is even worse. Basically, the group sat around a fire one night with two nerds who they sacrificed to the gods of the internet by first discussing their sexuality at length and then humiliating them about the fact they were virgins. Then they used Excel (the old version, like the UK government department that screwed up COViD-19 results) to calculate out a bunch of random numbers and letters and made them look like a protocol, crapping on about security by default and so on, only to come up with pregnant whale version of an internet protocol that is In the Penis Virgin 6 today. The two nerds who were sacrificed were not missed because they were nerds and no one likes nerds anyway. The gods of the internet are nerds as well, so they will be tracked down and shot, just like all other nerds when the Nerdocalypse comes
by honneamise October 29, 2020
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smuna

An adverb describing the increase physical displeasure at having a disease that is second only to Anaphalycticatardicon in its increasingly dangerous effects. Having smuna is a terrible afflication and people with the illness often appear ill, weak, pale and ghostly. Sort of like ryan sucks but worse. The only known cases of smuna have been discovered in a small town west of Melbourne, Australia. it is there that smuna has its roots. smuna frequently gets expanded to:
Super
Mega
Ultra
Nuclear
AIDS
Hey look at that bloke with smuna
Smuna makes the world horrible
I wish that guy with smuna would die
If I wanted a disease to be cool, it would definitely NOT be smuna
by honneamise December 3, 2018
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lasqueret

A word made up someone who hasn't got the capacity to read, write or spell and has mongoloidism. The word has no meaning and anyone who uses it suffers from Anaphalycticatardicon. Frequently used when a joelstal is encountered by people who think the word volience has meaning. When you meet someone who uses this word, kill them, burn their remains and slaughter their entire family.
For 4 years, I thought the word laserquest was lasqueret
Im a retard because I use the word lasqueret
If you catch me using the word lasqueret EVER, kill me, im unworthy of life
by honneamise May 20, 2024
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smung

Super
Mega
Ultra
Nuclear
Gay

A derivative illness similar to smuna that highlights the need for all those infected with smuna or smung to be driven from the face of the Earth and sent spiralling into outer space in a sealed bus that was formerly used for special school students. Smung is nearly as bad as smuna but you will only get smung if you have smuna anyway, meaning you are just a dirty weirdo and should be shot into outer space in a sealed bus used by special school students.
Those gaylords are getting on the bus for the smung people
How smung is that guy
by honneamise October 7, 2020
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uwu

A massively stupid reaction to apparent cuteness. Cute things are generally actually shit and have smuna. All people who use the word uwu are generally fat, wear glasses and are closet gay. If you are subjected to the use of uwu or are ever in a photo and someone says its uwu, kill them and yourself, the world will be a better place.
Oh it's so uwu cute. Bang.
If you call that cat uwu cute I'm going to shit down you neck
by honneamise July 5, 2020
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