SkidMarkyMark's definitions

PTT

An acronym that stands for "Push To Talk." It refers to a particular mode of cell phone usage wherein one holds the device in front of one's face, yelling at it and listening to its tinny speaker which continuously squawks an annoying chirping noise. A way for white trash and other lower orders to amuse themselves by pretending they're talking on radios just like policemen.

If you're using PTT on your cell phone, you're a waste of skin and should just kill yourself right now.

by SkidMarkyMark October 18, 2006

hiking the Appalachian Trail

v. To carry on an extramarital affair.

Governor Sanford can't meet with you today; he's "hiking the Appalachian Trail."

by SkidMarkyMark June 25, 2009

wiggle pigs

n. A synonym for white ladies' breasts. Imagine two little pink piglets squirming and jiggling around. They might look like a pair of C- to D-cup tits.

Hey, baby, how about you lose that shirt and let me play with your wiggle pigs.

by SkidMarkyMark April 30, 2010

boortz

n. Small nuggets of squishy poo accidentally fired into one's undies after pushing a fart too hard. Name refers not only to the sound made by the poo, but also to a shithead clueless radio host.

Ralph Wiggum hiked up his trousers, stuck his finger in his nose and said, "I made boortz in my pants!"

by SkidMarkyMark June 11, 2006

kentucky doorbell

To drive up to someone's house or apartment and proceed to honk the horn until they come out, rather than going to all the trouble of exiting the vehicle and going to the door.

Cletus across the street had a friend that would ring the Kentucky doorbell each morning at 5:00 am. I say "had" because me and my tire iron had a little chat with him.

by SkidMarkyMark May 28, 2006

fruit salad

n. An item rumored to exist at certain parties, consisting of a bowl filled with random pills. Partygoers dip into the bowl and experience random effects.

Back in the '80s--the "Just Say No" era--in elementary school health class, they warned us of the dangers of fruit salad. Of course, such a thing has never existed, but the important thing was to scare us away from drugs.

by SkidMarkyMark August 2, 2006

dragon wagon

n. A car--generally either a hybrid, a 15-year-old station wagon, or a rustbucket Geo--that features this bumper sticker on the rear:

"Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup."

It's actually legal to run this car off the road, pull the driver out, and beat them to death.

I saw a dragon wagon on the freeway the other day, so I killed the occupant, who was one of those annoying SCA types, before he could breed.

by SkidMarkyMark February 1, 2007