PaulAllensCard's definitions

ROM Job

1. A sexual encounter with a robot

2. Being molested by someone disguised as a robot

The new generation T-3000 is fully sentient, made from high-tensile alloys, is combat ready, and gives one tornado of an erotic ROM Job.

by PaulAllensCard February 2, 2015

Purse Dogma

1. The irrefutable law that any woman with a purse dog is a pretentious, vapid cunt

If you brave the perils of Purse Dogma, you and your little dog are going to hell bitch

by PaulAllensCard August 15, 2020

Cosby Jacket

The arrest record of a serial rapist or sex offender ("Jacket" being an acronym for a criminal history file). A play on the infamous "Cosby Sweater".

An in-depth background check on the school janitor revealed a Cosby Jacket hidden in his closet.

by PaulAllensCard January 29, 2015

Cocoa Puff

When you sit on someone else's pillow and blow a hot, rancid fart into it as you slowly raise your ass off it to create a sponge effect that will trap the smell inside. Later when that person goes to bed and presses their head into the pillow, the stale fart is ejected right into their face.

My mother-in-law is staying in the guest room, so I made sure to leave a cocoa puff in both pillows.

by PaulAllensCard January 29, 2015

Travelsectomy

TRAvel-sectomy Eng., N.: A horrible incident, drug or procedure which neutralizes one's will to travel

A bunch of motherfuckers are gonna get a travelsectomy this year

by PaulAllensCard January 20, 2021

Ejector Treats

The candy that blows out everywhere when a pilot hits the ejector seat to bail out of a fighter jet.

That way, you may have lost your cool airplane and will soon become a P.O.W. but at least there is candy.

During WWII, the Germans were the first to experiment with Ejector Treats

by PaulAllensCard February 5, 2015

Newskkake

Newskkake (noun, pron. "Nooz-Cocky", variation of root word Bukkake)

1. When annoying news or sports "reminders" explode all over your phone/ tablet/ computer notifications bar (Modern connotation)

2. When you subscribe to so many newspapers that legions of delivery boys eject their loads onto your lawn every night (Classic connotation)

(TV news anchor speaking) "We'll have more later on that possible nuke theft by ISIS, but first, more bizarre behavior by Lindsay Lohan! Apparently, LiLo has been spotted with what appears to be a custom built dildo-crackpipe hybrid, *and* what she's tweeting about it could save you money! For those of you at work, switch off your ringer and prepare for the inevitable all-day Newskkake."

by PaulAllensCard February 2, 2015