False Leadership

Similar to False Hustle in its blatant vomit inducing cosplay, False Leadership is typically seen in the work place, specifically in company meetings, emails with many people cc'd, or over-thanking people to their superiors.

The main goal is to portray one's self as a great leader, specifically in the eyes of their bosses.

It elicits rage from people who witness it on a consistent basis.
*In a Weekly Team Meeting*

Carly: I had Neil run some data tests for me, and then had Ignacio compare them to the other dates.

Neil: Ugh, false leadership. My JOB is to run data tests, I did them on my own accord. We have not spoken in 2 weeks.

Carly: *Looking at her boss Mark* Neil, that work really helped the team alot and helped me with my presentation. Thank you.

Neil: Kill me now.
by Mike109999 February 12, 2022
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85% Rule

Applies to sports bars that are always right near capacity, but you could always find a seat.

These unicorn bars are the best of both worlds for fans: A great atmosphere AND people know they could still get in without reservations.
Melissa: Where we watching the game tonight, Fam?

Jeff: Ugh, I totally forgot to make a reso, I have been busy all week.

Melissa: Ok, tip-off is in one hour, let's go to 99 Wings, they are an 85% Rule place.

Jeff: So good, and they have the best cajun rub wings.
by Mike109999 August 06, 2022
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Substitute Teacher Effect

When a struggling sports team fires their coach, and a new coach comes in and the team initially does really well.

Everyone is all smiles, the new coach tries new things, is fun and upbeat, and seemingly *changes the culture* so the team performs really well.....until they don't.

The few good games are due to excitement, and once the substitute teacher has to be a real teacher, fails spectacularly because he actually has to teach.
Boris: Oh fuck, you see how the new coach has turned this team around. I told you the old guy sucked.

Edgar: Meh, it is the Substitute Teacher Effect, come back to me in 3 months. Team is just playing well. New guy can't coach.

3 months later.....

Edgar: Team sucks, and coach looks really constipated.

Boris: Ya, you were right. Substitute Teacher Effect wins again.
by Mike109999 March 21, 2022
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Empty Net Goal

When your life is super easy, whether it be due to White Collar Steroids, or simply, things that are difficult or stressful for others are given to you.
Lance: Man, I cant even get an INTERVIEW for this role and I have all the credentials, how the heck did Keith get the job, he is an actual moron.

Spencer: Keegan's dad is a big deal at the firm, set the whole thing up. His life is an empty net goal.

Lance: Man, I wish MY life was an empty net goal, who the fuck wants to pay a mortgage every month.

Spencer: Ya, the worst is Keith acts like all of this is difficult for him. Like, Brosef, we know your life is an empty net goal and you don't have to worry about your car payments.
by Mike109999 January 31, 2022
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The exponential growth from positive professional experiences and jobs that grow over the years.
Warren: So cool you got this great new job from a contact you made almost 20 years ago.

Bruce: Ya, I met her at a networking event in 2006 right after my first promotion to get invited a trade show she hosted. Love that we stayed in touch and she recommended me for this role.

Warren: That's White Collar Compound Interest paying off, Brosef.
by Mike109999 September 02, 2023
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Kosher Style

When something or someone is not *technically* Jewish, but might as well be due to LITERALLY everything about them, including looks and mannerisms.

Like delis, George Costanza, and most hot moms under 5'8, for example.
Milo: Hey you want to do brunch this Saturday, I am macking hard on this new chick, Veronica, she will be there with friends.

Noah: Isn't she Jewish, does she go out Saturday?

Milo: Nah, she is just kosher style, she looks Jewish because she dyes her hair red, is 5'2, and still talks about her slutty semester abroad in 2004.

Noah: Cool, let's get some bacon, brosef.
by Mike109999 January 27, 2022
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White Collar Ginger

When you need a 5 minute break between tasks, as a mental reset, just like how ginger neutralizes your pallet between sushi pieces.

This is typically seen at work, although could be used in most busy settings.
Bert: Man, I am exhausted after that 3 hour meeting, and I have a call in 2 minutes with my top client. My brain is SO fried.

Duncan: Take a White Collar Ginger, I will cover for you.

Bert: Thanks man, just tell them I am in dispose or something stupid.
by Mike109999 November 02, 2024
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