2 definitions by JasperDee

1. Derogatory name for a girl defined by her large natural breasts and slutty behavior. She often refers to them as "the twins", habitually works her freakish bra size into casual conversation, and has perfected the art of complaining about the size of her chest while simultaneously bragging about it and making it the center of attention. Feeds on the stares of men like some kind of vampire. So-named because her boobs look like a cow's udders, and because she lets men use her body like that of a pleasure-giving barnyard animal. Has been titfucked so many times that an actual pearl necklace has formed around her neck.
2. Nickname given to the actress Christina Hendricks by the web community 4chan.
Check out that titcow's cleavage.
That's what she wants. Don't stare and out of neglect she'll probably ask you to stick your cock in it and jizz down her tummy.
by JasperDee August 18, 2010
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Rough unit of measurement for the female breast. Often utilized when proposing the cutoff point at which larger breasts should no longer be considered more desirable than smaller ones - the ideal between too small and too large. There are three main schools of thought: that more than a handful (an apple) is a waste, that more than two handfuls (a cantaloupe) is a waste, or that more than three handfuls (a melon) is a waste.
-More than a handful is a waste. Any bigger, and they're less perky, and get saggy with age.
-Nah, too small. The best tits have you cumming buckets when you fuck them, but aren't so big that they're much longer than they are wide. Two handfuls is perfect.
-If I can't completely smother my dick between a pair of tits, they're too small. Three handfuls is best.
by JasperDee August 19, 2010
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