Skip to main content

HMB's definitions

badasserarium

Any given place where more than one badass can reliably be found. In modern times, this may mean a certain night club, a certain seedy bar, or even any given trailer park - depending on the inhabitants.

Historically, this was named after the Badasserarium in Brundisium, a temple erected by Emperor Nero in the year 55. The original Badasserarium honored the final, most badass professional fighters left standing after the Great Gladiatorial Gangbang in July of that year. The survivors of a massive day-long free-for-all initiated with 900 heavily armed and alcoholically lubricated gladiators, these handful were granted the honorific Badassissimus, indicating status of an ass far worse than any other precursors in the field of badassery. Enshrined during their lifetimes as living saints of the Badasserarium, such was their fame that even respectable matrons and virgin girls of Brundisium would pay good money to spend fifteen seconds with any one of them, who would bestow his virility and virtue upon them with a Falcon Punch to the abdomen, leaving them unable to walk - sometimes permanently.

Upon being asked by Nero whether this was absolutely necessary, the Badassissimus responded by roaring incoherently and kicking a watermelon hard enough to orbit the known world twice and decapitate a nearby catamite the following Thursday. Suetonius translates this to mean: "Yes, I am afraid it is."
"This San Francisco restaurant once served lunch to Bruce Lee, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, and Chuck Norris at the same sitting. For the brief duration of that lunch, decades ago, this restaurant was a badasserarium."

"The Badassissimus of the Badasserarium was a badass well known for his consummate badassery."
by HMB May 2, 2010
mugGet the badasserariummug.

blue ball

1. A ball that is blue.
2. A testicle or testicles that are blue.
3. A testicle or testicles that have not been used for a long time and therefore, in male mythological perception, are blue in color. This is merely metaphorical as the only way that testicles can turn blue are A) through the application of ink or paint, as in the scrotal tattooes of the old wrinkled retainers of the WangaWonkee tribes of the lower Balkans, or B) through constriction, as in preparation for castration (to prevent urination, which may infect the wound before it heals adequately).
My girlfriend wouldn:t screw me/do me/tattoo me so I went to bed with blue balls.
by HMB April 27, 2003
mugGet the blue ballmug.

smartacity

The state of being a smart ass, or possibly something done to create such a state. A Latinate spelling of "smart-ass-ity".
HMB's urbandictionary definitions are characterized by their loquacity, obscurity, and smartacity.

"What your comment lacks in logical merit or accuracy, it more than makes up for in smartacity."
by HMB December 24, 2007
mugGet the smartacitymug.

decepticon

A slang term used in the prostitution trade to describe a transsexual or transvestite hooker (who are often called "Transformers"), especially one who is so convincing as a woman that friends and clients do not believe she was once a man.
"Holy shit! She ain't no Transformer... she a goddam DECEPTICON!"
by HMB April 28, 2005
mugGet the decepticonmug.

freedom flag

1. A flag that stands for freedom.
2. "Le Tricolore" - The flag of France (in the present anti-French climate). This strikes me as being hilariously amusing because the entire reason why the Congress renamed French fries in the first place was to show that France did not support military action for freedom. The ironic juxtaposition inherent in the subtextual deconstructuralist narrative frame of this dialogical reificate is so funny that it makes me want to shit my pants, wipe it on the windows, and then run naked through Congress with my hands in the air gibbering like a lunatic.
1. Dude, the American flag is the only freedom flag in the world because everybody knows that America is the only free country in the world.

2. What flag do the French have then?

1. Shit.
by HMB May 11, 2003
mugGet the freedom flagmug.

Predator's face

(noun) Euphemism for a somewhat intimidating looking vagina, especially one with curved pedipalpical hook-shaped teeth and an Ozzy Osborne hairstyle. Not usually considered an aphrodisiac.
"I heard that the Governor of California only got his job because of his onscreen performance in giving the Predator's face a good licking."
by HMB November 23, 2003
mugGet the Predator's facemug.

HMB

1. Shorthand for "Hamburger" in Brazilian outlets of clown subsidized fast food McByproduct joints.
2. Human growth hormone, popular with East German women's swimming teams.
3. Her Majesty's Bulldog. Euphemism for an untidy vagina and pubic area on an otherwise posh female specimen.
1, 2, and 3. "I'd love to have a large sized HMB in a bathtub with Peach dressing. Yeah."
by HMB March 27, 2003
mugGet the HMBmug.

Share this definition