HMB's definitions
A German word meaning "both yes and no". Derives from the German "ja" for yes, and "nein" for no. Rhymes with "shine". This usually is said in response to a question that appears to be a yes/no question but on later consideration is actually more complicated than that.
HMB: I hear in Germany they sell alcoholic beverages by the liter instead of by the pint. I'll bet that's a much better way to enjoy yourself.
Dagmar (perplexed and pondering): Jein. Actually it is not being that simple, for the price of a glass of beer is higher than elsewhere, also it is harder to pace yourself... but I understand that time is rare so I must shrug it off.
HMB: LOL and ROLFMAO at your awesome German transliterations! "Time is rare"! You German girls are so cool! (Nuffles Dagmar.)
Dagmar (bewildered): ...does not compute...
Dagmar (perplexed and pondering): Jein. Actually it is not being that simple, for the price of a glass of beer is higher than elsewhere, also it is harder to pace yourself... but I understand that time is rare so I must shrug it off.
HMB: LOL and ROLFMAO at your awesome German transliterations! "Time is rare"! You German girls are so cool! (Nuffles Dagmar.)
Dagmar (bewildered): ...does not compute...
by HMB November 25, 2006
Get the jein mug.1. The act, state, or condition of being hideous.
2. A word you say when you have died and gone to heaven or hell and, upon being faced with a nonplussed deity, with which you greet them.
2. A word you say when you have died and gone to heaven or hell and, upon being faced with a nonplussed deity, with which you greet them.
1. "Jane Austen's latest undiscovered offering, 'Pointlessness and Pretentiosity', reveals a new female protagonist, whose tenacity is matched only by her hideity and the length of her pubic mustache."
2. GOD: HMB, you stand accused of a lifetime granted by My grace, wasted in pursuit of atheism, masturbation, and belief in Darwinian evolutionary theory. What have you to say for yourself?
HMB: Hideity.
2. GOD: HMB, you stand accused of a lifetime granted by My grace, wasted in pursuit of atheism, masturbation, and belief in Darwinian evolutionary theory. What have you to say for yourself?
HMB: Hideity.
by HMB March 27, 2003
Get the hideity mug.1. A biological process by which information is passively absorbed, in a matter similar to osmosis, from episodes on TV or radio. Usually happens when you are focussing on doing something else while somebody in the same room is viewing or listening to the media. This can lead to false associations.
2. A sociological process whereby knowledge or behavior is transferred through occurrences that are regular and can be tracked over time. This can include: routine noisy arguments from the family living across the street, shouted tactical instructions from the beergut living next door each time there's an American football game on TV, and finding out that the various counts of first-degree homicide and cannibalism that your janitor stands accused of in routine police raids on his utility room.
2. A sociological process whereby knowledge or behavior is transferred through occurrences that are regular and can be tracked over time. This can include: routine noisy arguments from the family living across the street, shouted tactical instructions from the beergut living next door each time there's an American football game on TV, and finding out that the various counts of first-degree homicide and cannibalism that your janitor stands accused of in routine police raids on his utility room.
1.
Fnor: Do you watch Scrubs, HMB?
HMB: Not really. I've followed some of the plot through epismosis, but usually while downloading Sylvia Saint multimedia. Wasn't there one time that Zach Braff rides the Sybian?
Fnor: No.
2. Hague inspector: We deduce the victim to have expired after involuntary respiratory constriction at about 4 a.m. last night. We suspect epismosis of the General Secretary's late-night physical trysts with his administrative assistant in a nearby office may have caused a displacement of the victim's sexual energy as he slept, resulting in a lung erection that would prove fatal. However, investigators have not ruled out the possibility of poisoning. (Lead Inspector Franconi's confidential report following the death of former Serbian leader Slobodan Milosevich.)
Fnor: Do you watch Scrubs, HMB?
HMB: Not really. I've followed some of the plot through epismosis, but usually while downloading Sylvia Saint multimedia. Wasn't there one time that Zach Braff rides the Sybian?
Fnor: No.
2. Hague inspector: We deduce the victim to have expired after involuntary respiratory constriction at about 4 a.m. last night. We suspect epismosis of the General Secretary's late-night physical trysts with his administrative assistant in a nearby office may have caused a displacement of the victim's sexual energy as he slept, resulting in a lung erection that would prove fatal. However, investigators have not ruled out the possibility of poisoning. (Lead Inspector Franconi's confidential report following the death of former Serbian leader Slobodan Milosevich.)
by HMB May 18, 2006
Get the epismosis mug.1. The rate at which new employees vacate a given job or company, based on dissatisfaction with bad work conditions.
2. The rate at which a person's previous meal vacates his or her stomach, based on the intensity of their vomitting.
3. The rate at which a man's semen vacates his testicles, prostate, and Cowper's glands, based on the intensity of masturbation.
2. The rate at which a person's previous meal vacates his or her stomach, based on the intensity of their vomitting.
3. The rate at which a man's semen vacates his testicles, prostate, and Cowper's glands, based on the intensity of masturbation.
All: Yale's MBA program postulates the "Churn Rate Paradigm" as:
Client's churn rate = k(worker's stomach churn rate) = k(new worker's churn rate)
The intervariable relation is proportional and geometric.
1. The new-employee churn rate at my previous job was really high.
2. The work itself was nauseating. I would vomit at least twice a day. On high traffic days, employee stomach churn rate was even higher.
3. It was a mopping job at a sperm bank/peep show/gay brothel (delete as appropriate). For some reason, I always ended up with the highest clientele churn rate. I hated that job. I'm going back to Taco Bell.
Client's churn rate = k(worker's stomach churn rate) = k(new worker's churn rate)
The intervariable relation is proportional and geometric.
1. The new-employee churn rate at my previous job was really high.
2. The work itself was nauseating. I would vomit at least twice a day. On high traffic days, employee stomach churn rate was even higher.
3. It was a mopping job at a sperm bank/peep show/gay brothel (delete as appropriate). For some reason, I always ended up with the highest clientele churn rate. I hated that job. I'm going back to Taco Bell.
by HMB February 10, 2004
Get the churn rate mug.(noun) From Ancient Greek dramatic tradition, this usually comes after a great revelation (anagnorisis) has occurred, and consists of a reversal of fortunes. Thus, a king who rules wisely for fifty years, then discovers that he killed his father and married his mother without knowing it, is at that point in time a participant in a peripetaeia.
Film Critic 1: "I was relaxing with a few porn vids the other night and it turns out one of them was a gay porn tape that I'd shoplifted by mistake. Well, guess who was starring in that gay tape?"
Film Critic 2: "Dude, I don't know. I don't watch gay porn."
Film Critic 1: "Me neither, but get this: it was Peter North."
Film Critic 2: "No way!"
Film Critic 1: "I swear, it was Peter North. And another guy was doing him up the butt and then he comes all over the schoolroom table."
Film Critic 2: "Well this certainly makes for a very dramatic peripetaeia, coming as it does hot on the heels of an anagnorisis."
Film Critic 1: "Yes, and we might even say that his latent homosexuality is his hamartia."
Film Critic 2: "Dude, I don't know. I don't watch gay porn."
Film Critic 1: "Me neither, but get this: it was Peter North."
Film Critic 2: "No way!"
Film Critic 1: "I swear, it was Peter North. And another guy was doing him up the butt and then he comes all over the schoolroom table."
Film Critic 2: "Well this certainly makes for a very dramatic peripetaeia, coming as it does hot on the heels of an anagnorisis."
Film Critic 1: "Yes, and we might even say that his latent homosexuality is his hamartia."
by HMB November 20, 2003
Get the peripetaeia mug.Masturbating a woman or girl to orgasm. This takes its name from the "flicking" motion of the middle finger when you are using a wheelmouse and trying to scroll down through a lot of text. In masturbation the action is almost exactly the same, except that the mouse wheel is replaced by your lucky lady's clit.
Also, I've noticed that the sound produced is completely different.
A similar computer/sex term is "double clicking on the mouse" which also means female masturbation.
Also, I've noticed that the sound produced is completely different.
A similar computer/sex term is "double clicking on the mouse" which also means female masturbation.
HMB (who is male): So, AC, what did you do all day today?
AC (who is female): You would not believe. I found a kick-ass .zip of photochopped fake Johnny Depp porn. It was a really big file, too. I had to spend almost two hours rolling the mouse wheel just to get through it.
HMB: Dear me. Airing the orchid?
AC: You bet. I got my daily musical practice of playing the upside down piano.
HMB: Feeding oats to the pony?
AC: Tickling the toothless gibbon.
HMB: Typing in the gussets.
AC: Paddling the pink canoe until it leaks.
HMB: Finger painting the ham sandwich.
AC: Stirring the mixing bowl.
HMB: Petting the cat.
AC: Fingering the bald suspect.
HMB: ... So, um, can I borrow that .zip file? ... For, erm, personal reasons...
AC: !
AC (who is female): You would not believe. I found a kick-ass .zip of photochopped fake Johnny Depp porn. It was a really big file, too. I had to spend almost two hours rolling the mouse wheel just to get through it.
HMB: Dear me. Airing the orchid?
AC: You bet. I got my daily musical practice of playing the upside down piano.
HMB: Feeding oats to the pony?
AC: Tickling the toothless gibbon.
HMB: Typing in the gussets.
AC: Paddling the pink canoe until it leaks.
HMB: Finger painting the ham sandwich.
AC: Stirring the mixing bowl.
HMB: Petting the cat.
AC: Fingering the bald suspect.
HMB: ... So, um, can I borrow that .zip file? ... For, erm, personal reasons...
AC: !
by HMB December 9, 2006
Get the rolling the mouse wheel mug.1. Old English term for the word "arse" (which means "ass").
2. Present day term for the Irish tongue.
2. Present day term for the Irish tongue.
by HMB April 6, 2003
Get the erse mug.