Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Brown Cuffed

When an impromptu fisting of a co-worker over lunch break turns messy after the fister fails to roll up the cuff and sleeve of their dress shirt before performing this highly pleasurable act.

Hi Joe. What happened to your shirt? Spill hot chocolate?

No. I fisted Betty in accounting at lunch time today. We were running short on time and I forgot to roll up my sleeve.

Nasty. Ya got brown cuffed brooohhhh.

by Eaton Holgoode December 11, 2015

Mop Cunt

An extremely hairy pussy that, when wet, looks like a old saggy sloppy wet janitor's mop head.

Braaaaaahh. I pulled down them panties and whohhh! I was staring at a mop cunt.

by Eaton Holgoode April 13, 2017

Milkmaid Express

A quick, downward yanking hand job performed by a female. The male leans face first against a wall at a 45 degree angle allowing the penis and ballsack to dangle freely from the fly like an engorged udder. The female, while kneeling, squatting or seated on a small stool vigorously yanks and pulls on the man bits like she’s milking a cow until a rope of nut is milked to completion.

My manager gave me a milkmaid Express in the stockroom last night after close.

Rachel pulled up the ottoman and the next thing I know I was getting the milkmaid express.

by Eaton Holgoode January 23, 2018

Blistered Sister

A nun with a prominent and questionable cold sore.

Father Mulveaney couldn't help but notice the blistered sister sitting in the front row at mass. He made an appointment with his family doctor after service just to be safe.

by Eaton Holgoode November 28, 2015

Clemson Dinner

A meal consisting of fast food and generally unhealthy food choices.

These extra pounds are no doubt from many Clemson dinners.

by Eaton Holgoode January 15, 2019

Taffy Balls

When a soft, shorn, dangly male scrotum sticks to both inner thighs while walking or running causing the sack and balls to be stretched in alternating fashion. Gives the appearance of taffy being pulled on a taffy puller. See taffy sack.

I went for a walk this afternoon. The humidity caused me to have taffy balls. That was a long 3 miles.

by Eaton Holgoode October 20, 2018

Mashin’ Ho

Your go to fuck slut. Not a friend with benefits as a mashin’ ho is just a walking set of sex holes and there is no meaningful relationship beyond busting your nut when you need to.

Rachel is my mashin’ ho.

This party is full of mashin’ hos.

Pretty sure my cousin would be my mashin’ ho.

by Eaton Holgoode June 11, 2018