AKACroatalin's definitions

Coprolite

Coprolite is a noun meaning fossilised animal faeces. The word literally means “dung stone” and comes from the Greek kopros (dung) and lithikos (stone). Usually coprolites are animal manure and, between 1860 and 1890, were mined commercially in Cambridgeshire England and processed to be used as a fertiliser. When you think of it, it’s not that much of a surprise, after all it is fossilised shit. What is also not too surprising is that the word has also come to describe a person who is old, set in their ways and a thoroughly disagreeable arsehole as well. So if you have a boss, teacher or acquaintance who fits that description, congratulations, you know a coprolite.

It’s only Malcolm’s age that stops him being a complete coprolite.

by AKACroatalin September 6, 2016

Pongoes

British slang dating from the mid to late nineteenth century, meaning soldiers. Soldiers were not popular at this time as Kipling’s poem Tommy shows (Barrack Room Ballads 1892). The word itself stems from expressions used by comedians in theatres and music halls to get a cheap laugh. The two that are most commonly quoted are "where the army goes the pong goes", or “when the wind blows the pong goes”, pong meaning smell. This quickly became pongoes meaning soldiers plural and pongo meaning an individual. Another possible explanation is that the soldiers were being likened to a large, hairy, smelly ape called a pongo. The expression is still in use today although not common, confined mainly to those who saw service in World War II or Korea (very few now) or who did National Service in Britain while this was still compulsory.

Ambulance chasing lawyers, seeking compensation for terrorists, still see soldiers as pongoes.

by AKACroatalin September 9, 2016

Dorkelfie

Literally a selfie taken by someone who is a dork. The ultimate destination for these pictures is social media and the people who take them are usually insecure, self-obsessed, self-aggrandising sad acts with no real friends. Oh dear! I think I may just have described a significant proportion of Facebook users.

From one perspective, any selfie is a dorkelfie.

by AKACroatalin April 22, 2015

Renifleur

A renifleur is someone, can be male or female, with a medical condition that gives them sexual pleasure from smells. It doesn’t result in them being slightly turned on, but clothes off, into bed, or even the nearest patch of grass, and get it on. The condition can be triggered by a particular smell, usually quite specific and forming part of a fragrance, but in very rare cases it can be triggered by ordinary, everyday, common smells which means that the person must be kept in a sterile, odour-free environment. Surprisingly, many people exhibit a toned down version of this trait which is why males and females can be more sexually receptive when a certain perfume or aftershave is used.

Have you smelled the stench coming off Malcolm? He's enough to make the most ardent renifleur get a gas mask!

by AKACroatalin February 27, 2019

Healeish

Not to be confused with hellish, healish is English slang derived from the word heale, it is an adjective used to describe someone whose behaviour is that of a total tosser, waste of space or OIC. They are the sort of people for whom arsehole is too kind a name, who are narcissistic crawlers with little in the way of either intelligence or talent. Avoid them at all costs as their proximity will bring on attacks of acute nausea.

"Have you seen what that healeish wanker has done?"

by AKACroatalin March 31, 2015

Nomophobe

A nomophobe is a person suffering from nomophobia. You know the people I mean, the ones with a mobile phone stuck to their ear. If they aren’t talking on it they’re fiddling with it in some bizarre form of electronic masturbation. If they stop for more than five seconds, a strange glazed look comes over them, starting at their eyes but gradually taking over their whole face until they either start chattering rubbish to somebody or fiddling with the thing like Nero on steroids. When you next see one take a really good look as they are a dying species, too busy playing with their phones to breed.

Nomophobe, a sad act constantly pissing about with a mobile phone.

by AKACroatalin April 28, 2015

BAB

Acronym, probably originating in the USA standing for Born Again Biker. This refers to a person, usually male in their forties or fifties, who goes through some sort of mid-life crisis and buys themselves a huge and expensive motorcycle, together with shedloads of gear and takes to the road in an attempt to recapture their lost youth. This is invariably a failure and many of them get over it in twelve to eighteen months, some of them, however, become traffic accident statistics.

Jimmy’s gone and bought himself a Ducati! He’s become a real BAB!

by AKACroatalin March 14, 2019