A phrase of utter and complete shock and surprise in the most extreme sense.
Bro: Hey, Donald Trump won the election!
Other bro: Well, fuck me up the ass and call me stupid.
by ZenTam April 19, 2018
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To take unfair advantage, such as in business negotiations, while seizing the moral high ground.
Bob: I can purchase the equipment you’re selling at a lower price AND from an environmentally conscious supplier.
Ted: Oh for Christ’s sake, don’t fuck me up the ass like a Catholic priest!
by Worthy_sojourner September 4, 2021
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A phrase that may be exclaimed in situations concerning stupid actions/accidents carried out by yourself.

It can be used to signify individuals near you that your poor motor skills coupled with hand-eye coordination are just as affective as bringing a pack of bubblegum instead of a grenade to war.

After taking the tray of Tater-Tots out of the oven, you remove the oven mittens.
While trying to grab one with your bare hands, you burn your wrist/arm/upper limb on the metal try.

* "Ouch! Fuck Me up the Goat Ass!"


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To take unfair advantage of someone, such as in business negotiations, while seizing the moral high ground.
Bob: We can purchase the equipment at a lower price AND from an environmentally conscious supplier.
Ted: Oh for Christ’s sake, don’t try to fuck me up the ass like a Catholic priest!
by Worthy_sojourner September 4, 2021
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An exclamation of extreme shock and disbelief, whether at an event or a sight being witnessed.

Can also be used when you discover someone has been fucking you over.
Person 1: Holy shit! What the hell is that person doing?
Person 2: Well, fuck me figuratively up the ass, they're raping a dog.

Person 1: You have a date with Sally? You know, she has a boyfriend.
Person 2: Fuck me figuratively up the ass! Three months and she never said anything!
by ElectroSophie March 29, 2009
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when you unleash your rage on a dickhead because they cant stop singing
shut the fuck up you bitch ass mother fucker
by ur sexual dad March 16, 2022
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When someone bamboozles you, being bamboozled

When someone makes a fool out of you
Declan: I told you Dave, she sent nudes to five other guys. You owe me five bucks!
Dave: Well Fuck me up the ass and call me your bitch!

Dave: *Hands over a crisp 5 dollar bill
by DirtyDave42069 March 8, 2017
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