cut the cards's definitions

jiffy pop

Ilhan Omars turban

Abdul: I see they took Ilhan Omar off the Foreign Affairs Committee.

Bill: Yes, poor jiffy pop head.

by cut the cards March 26, 2023

landing pad

Bald spot

Jill: There's a Chinese balloon headed our way.

Joe: No worries, I will go down on the beach and flash the landing pad for it to land on.

Jill: Good idea. Maybe it is dropping off our cash too.

by cut the cards February 5, 2023

convertible

That one guy with a toupee everyone knows is a toupee but thinks no one else knows

Roger: Man, we sure had a good time at the club.

Harvey: Yes. Did you see the convertible ?

Roger: Yes. He didn't think I saw him take out the garbage in the morning with it all the way removed.

by cut the cards March 8, 2023

parachute

Huge white bloomers

Mike: That gal you picked up last night just left when you were in the shower.
Harvey: Thanks.

Mike: You sure can pick em. She was a big gal.

Harvey: I know, when I woke up out of my stupor I saw her underwear on the floor. I thought I left my window open and a parachute landed through the window. Never again, man.

by cut the cards January 25, 2023

silver stinker

Someone you met at silver sneakers workout class.

Roger: I went to the spin class at silver sneakers.

Carl: How was it ?

Roger: I met this nice looking older woman.

Carl: How did that go ?

Roger: She turned out to be a silver stinker once we went to her place.

by cut the cards January 7, 2023

reeking around the Christmas tree

Relatives that wear old reeking sweaters that smell like cigarettes.

Mabel: How do you like my vintage Christmas sweater I have not washed for decades ?

Junior: It's nice.

Mabel: I am taking a smoke break I will be right back. We will be reeking around the Christmas tree soon.
Junior: Thanks for the warning.

by cut the cards December 19, 2022

chirp

The wife chirping in your ear all day and night.

Wife: You are going golfing, etc. ?

Hubby: Yes do you approve dear?

Wife: NO. Stay home with me and watch Hallmark channel.

Hubby: See ya I'm going.

Wife: No day drinking otherwise you can forget about you know what later tonight.

Hubby: No problem chirp.

by cut the cards December 31, 2022