The Colonel's definitions

pit

A particularly deep or cavernous tube created by a breaking wave.

The surf was unreal today, bro...I pulled into some sick pits.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

warbly

Uneven ripples on waves (similar to a boat wake) typically caused by angled backwash during an ebbing tide. These ripples warp the wave and create an unsteady, wobbly ride (warp + wobbbly = warbly).

Dude, that wave was so warbly that I wiped out.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

Defcon

Stands for "defecation condition" - a play off of the government acronym for "defense condition". Refers to the varying, and usually scaling, levels of severity relating to an impending bowel movement. The direction of the sliding scale varies from user to user, but typical usage labels Defcon 1 as the least urgent, and Defcon 5 as an imminent expulsion (the opposite of the defense department's usage).

Dude, I was at Defcon 5 and nearly shit my pants. Luckily we drove by a Carl's Jr. and I was able to drop a load.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

sockrifice

A sockrifice occurs when a person runs out of toilet paper and is forced to use a spare sock to wipe one's bum.

Dude, we ran out of teeps yesterday and this morning I had to peform a sockrifice.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

shit legs

The numbing of one's legs after a lengthy session on the toilet (the toilet seat rim is typical applying pressure to a certain area of the upper leg that can decrease the flow of blood to the legs, causing numbness). The person will typically lose their balance when standing up to either wipe themselves or pull their pants up.

Dude, I took such a long shit this morning that I got shit legs and fell against the wall.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

klugle

The jamming of one's thumb into the deck of a surfboard - caused by extremely hard surf wax being applied to the board on a cold morning and then catching on the existing wax.

Dude, it was so cold this morning that I got the worst klugle when I was waxing my board. I almost bent my fingernail back.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

shacked

A surfer that is so deep inside the tubing part of the wave that he is completely enveloped - likened to being inside a fully enclosed dwelling, such as a shack.

Dude, I just got shacked on that wave.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003