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TANTI - (SHAUN WARD)'s definitions

Flying Carpet

Akin to log watching under the glass coffee table, where the missus lays one out and you can watch the delivery without getting a face full of corn. The flying carpet is when she jumps over the coffee table naked, in the style of a Olympic hurdler and you get a snapshot of her hairy tomato barmcake
Peter was giddily chasing naked Marrion around the living room, when she expertly hurdled the living room coffee table, where Shaun was laying in wait, perfectly positioned for a snapshot of her beautiful puffed up fluffy flying carpet.
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) August 11, 2004
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Tripe Hound

Akin to the swamp donkey but with a verocious appetite. Can eat one potato more than a pig.
Look at that tripe hound over there, imagine giving that a "top hat magoo".
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) June 3, 2004
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Squidgy Pyapps

Occurs the morning after a good lash on the wife beater (Stella Artois)and doner kebab. Confident crop dusting in the office is soon bought to a halt, when ones' kex are suddenly and explosively filled with gelatinous clarts.
Sorry lads, I'm going to have to leave the course because I've just loaded my undercrackers with Squidgy Pyapps. It feels like a flock of sparrows have just landed.
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) June 3, 2004
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Wife Beater

Feeling RAF this morning, i've took sixteen pints of wife beater on board last night
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) June 3, 2004
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Flock of Sparrows

When visable bottom sickness has the appearance of a flock of sparrows landing. Similar to Squidgy Pyapps but liberated.
Ooooh, I've just been to drop the kids off and it was like a flock of sparrows landing.
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) June 3, 2004
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Tomato Barmcake

Enlarged / well endowed female clitoral region
Look at the beetle bonnet on that, it's like a tomato barmcake gone wrong
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) June 3, 2004
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Boxing Glove

Enlarged, gorged clitoris
After Howard had finished his panty pudding, Marina's tomato barmcake was that puffed up and swollen it was like a boxing glove
by TANTI - (SHAUN WARD) June 3, 2004
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