OffBeatDrummer's definitions
Pete: Inferiorites! Mediocrites! Idioites!
Jared: Calm down Pete! What is going on!?!
Pete: Cumcast is back at it again. I call them up to tell 'em my new 1Gbps Internet is hosed. They tell me: "Sir! It's running at 100Mbps. That's fast enough don't you think?!"
Jared: So you're basically getting only 1/10th of the Internet speed for what you pay them.
Pete: Exactly! If it weren't for sports channels, I would have canned the motherfuckers long time ago.
Jared: You can get those channels by becoming a cordcutter
Pete: Great idea Jared! You just saved my life! Let's go get smashed while watching the football game!
Jared: Calm down Pete! What is going on!?!
Pete: Cumcast is back at it again. I call them up to tell 'em my new 1Gbps Internet is hosed. They tell me: "Sir! It's running at 100Mbps. That's fast enough don't you think?!"
Jared: So you're basically getting only 1/10th of the Internet speed for what you pay them.
Pete: Exactly! If it weren't for sports channels, I would have canned the motherfuckers long time ago.
Jared: You can get those channels by becoming a cordcutter
Pete: Great idea Jared! You just saved my life! Let's go get smashed while watching the football game!
by OffBeatDrummer November 5, 2020
Get the Idioite mug.Just a fun way of saying idiot that sounds like idy-yoda. Also, perhaps denoting an iota of idiocy, an idiot who is very small due to their idiotic actions, or just an idiot who is tiny/petite.
Lucy: 50 times 2 is?
Rachel: 200
Lucy: No, you idiota. Haven't you been paying attention in class? Just take off the zero, multiply 5 by 2, and add the zero back: 100
Rachel: 200
Lucy: No, you idiota. Haven't you been paying attention in class? Just take off the zero, multiply 5 by 2, and add the zero back: 100
by OffBeatDrummer November 9, 2020
Get the Idiota mug.A squeakfest is pretty much any social media website where all people squeak constantly non-stop about unimportant stuff while getting too emo about it.
Big obvious squeakfests are Twitter, Reddit, and Facebook to name a few.
Big obvious squeakfests are Twitter, Reddit, and Facebook to name a few.
Tom: Twitter claims to be a diverse all-inclusive website, but everyone on it is an emo squeaker. I don't get what's diverse about that when everyone on it is just squeaking non-stop. Point to me one Twitter account of someone who is not a squeaker!
David: I cannot! I'd have to go on Twitter squeaking to do so. I'm not a squeaker either, so no dice! Twitter is definitely a squeakfest!
David: I cannot! I'd have to go on Twitter squeaking to do so. I'm not a squeaker either, so no dice! Twitter is definitely a squeakfest!
by OffBeatDrummer March 20, 2022
Get the Squeakfest mug.Just another word for clickety clackety; that is making noise through typing on a computer keyboard.
Darren: Two tickets to Denver, Colorado please!
Norah (Flight Agent): *clickety-clack*. No problem sir. I found a flight. You're all booked!
* * *
Kelly: Could you please find out how many PTOs I have left this year?
Katherine (H.R. Agent): Sure thing! *clickety-clack* It says here you got one week left.
* * *
Jason: *clickety-clack* The Sword of Shannara! That's the first book in the Shannara series.
Laura: What about the author's other series about the lawyer who becomes a king?
Jason: *clickety-clack* The Magic Kingdom of Landover. Here, take the keyboard. The library search engine is quite easy to use. What is yet another series by that same author?
Laura: *clickety-clack* The Word and the Void.
Norah (Flight Agent): *clickety-clack*. No problem sir. I found a flight. You're all booked!
* * *
Kelly: Could you please find out how many PTOs I have left this year?
Katherine (H.R. Agent): Sure thing! *clickety-clack* It says here you got one week left.
* * *
Jason: *clickety-clack* The Sword of Shannara! That's the first book in the Shannara series.
Laura: What about the author's other series about the lawyer who becomes a king?
Jason: *clickety-clack* The Magic Kingdom of Landover. Here, take the keyboard. The library search engine is quite easy to use. What is yet another series by that same author?
Laura: *clickety-clack* The Word and the Void.
by OffBeatDrummer November 23, 2020
Get the Clickety-clack mug.Aaron: "Sell! Sell! Sell!" says the Mad Money dude. Do you buy that!? Everyone is listening to him blindly. I don't get it.
Oliver: People bought his line about the market bubble. Idiots Unite!
Jared: Well, if it isn't the smart and talented Charlotte?!?!
Charlotte: What's up Jared?!
Jared: I saw a whole bunch of people following you after class yesterday. What happened!?
Charlotte: I told the instructor I missed the exam because I found out I was pregnant. People kept bugging me afterwards about who the father was. Idiots Unite! Hello!!! It's my new husband Baldwin, who else might it be!?!!
Sophia: Skiing in the summer?! Who does that!!!?
Scarlett: Apparently, Lisa and company. They haven't had enough skiing in the winter it seems.
Sophia: Oh wow! Didn't they go every weekend!!? I mean, I go three times a year and that's more than enough. In the summer, it's beach time baby!
Scarlett: I'm with you, summer means sunbathing on the beach every single day! Let's just leave it at Idiots Unite! Lisa and her friends seem to really dig summer skiing instead. Their loss.
Oliver: People bought his line about the market bubble. Idiots Unite!
Jared: Well, if it isn't the smart and talented Charlotte?!?!
Charlotte: What's up Jared?!
Jared: I saw a whole bunch of people following you after class yesterday. What happened!?
Charlotte: I told the instructor I missed the exam because I found out I was pregnant. People kept bugging me afterwards about who the father was. Idiots Unite! Hello!!! It's my new husband Baldwin, who else might it be!?!!
Sophia: Skiing in the summer?! Who does that!!!?
Scarlett: Apparently, Lisa and company. They haven't had enough skiing in the winter it seems.
Sophia: Oh wow! Didn't they go every weekend!!? I mean, I go three times a year and that's more than enough. In the summer, it's beach time baby!
Scarlett: I'm with you, summer means sunbathing on the beach every single day! Let's just leave it at Idiots Unite! Lisa and her friends seem to really dig summer skiing instead. Their loss.
by OffBeatDrummer November 25, 2020
Get the Idiots Unite mug.A beneather is someone who automatically puts themselves beneath others by behaving inappropriately and lowering their social status as a result. Due to their own negligent self-unaware improper behavior, a beneather loses the respect of everyone and becomes a stomping ground for others without people being aware they are stomping on the beneather. A beneather often becomes an inadvertant stepping stone for others during their climb of the ladder of life.
John: Hey, care to give a buck to the poor for Christmas?
Bob: Christmas! Do you really believe in that crap!?! Do you even know what Christmas is really all about!? It's consumerism! I don't give during Christmas. This is just a sham to cheat me out of a good buck!
John (ignoring Bob as just a beneather): Susie! Wanna give a buck to the poor for Christmas?
Susie: Sure! Go ahead! Here are $10 bucks!
Later on, John, Susie, and everyone else at their little company avoids inviting Bob to the Christmas party!
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Edward: Hi, would you mind helping me with this data analysis problem?
George: You need my help? What does that say about your math skills?!
Edwards (realizes George is just a beneather): Jonathan! I heard you're quite crafty with data analysis problems. Mind lending me a hand?!
Jonathan: Sure, why not!
A few weeks later...
George: Hey Edward! I've been trying to use this visualization tool, but my comptuer keeps going bust and I am almost gonna miss the deadline. Can you help me?
Edward: Sure!
George (noticing Edward is slow): Edward! Are you sure you know what you're doing!? You're so slow... I could have solved this problem on my own!
Edward: I'll leave you to it then.
A few days later... George gets fired! Eventually, he is begging on the street and his coworkers pass by him without ever recognizing him. They drop him a buck every now and then, and feel happy they are helping the community, but George is not happy! The end of a beneather!
Bob: Christmas! Do you really believe in that crap!?! Do you even know what Christmas is really all about!? It's consumerism! I don't give during Christmas. This is just a sham to cheat me out of a good buck!
John (ignoring Bob as just a beneather): Susie! Wanna give a buck to the poor for Christmas?
Susie: Sure! Go ahead! Here are $10 bucks!
Later on, John, Susie, and everyone else at their little company avoids inviting Bob to the Christmas party!
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Edward: Hi, would you mind helping me with this data analysis problem?
George: You need my help? What does that say about your math skills?!
Edwards (realizes George is just a beneather): Jonathan! I heard you're quite crafty with data analysis problems. Mind lending me a hand?!
Jonathan: Sure, why not!
A few weeks later...
George: Hey Edward! I've been trying to use this visualization tool, but my comptuer keeps going bust and I am almost gonna miss the deadline. Can you help me?
Edward: Sure!
George (noticing Edward is slow): Edward! Are you sure you know what you're doing!? You're so slow... I could have solved this problem on my own!
Edward: I'll leave you to it then.
A few days later... George gets fired! Eventually, he is begging on the street and his coworkers pass by him without ever recognizing him. They drop him a buck every now and then, and feel happy they are helping the community, but George is not happy! The end of a beneather!
by OffBeatDrummer December 16, 2021
Get the Beneather mug.Joey: Guess what happened today at the grocery shop where I work! I caught someone stealing!!
Xavier: Did he go to jail?
Joey: No, he got the baseball bat treatment!
Xavier: Did he go to jail?
Joey: No, he got the baseball bat treatment!
by OffBeatDrummer September 26, 2023
Get the Baseball Bat Treatment mug.