Lord Grimcock's definitions

woggerel

Tub-thumping ethnic poetry of no particular merit. It is estimated that if some means were found of converting woggerel into energy, Maya Angelou alone could power the whole of Kettering.

'Benjamin Zephaniah's latest compilation of self-justifying arsewad is pure woggerel.'

'Thank you Germaine. Tom Paulin?'

by Lord Grimcock August 26, 2007

fuckard

Archaic. A means of denoting one who is not too bright.

'Faith, Mowbray, th'art in sooth a knave and a fuckard.

by Lord Grimcock August 25, 2007

Belgian biscuit

British. To quote the Profanisaurus, 'a vile and non-specific sex act performed by the staff of a rub-a-tug shop'.

Whatever it is it's rarely heard outside of Viz and, depending on exactly what you take it to mean, rarely seen either, thank Christ.

I offered him a Cleveland steamer and the filthy cunt's only asked if I do Belgian biscuit.

by Lord Grimcock September 11, 2007

FADS

Zip, nada, bugger all. Fuck All Divided by Six.

Yez cunts' word's wuth FADS.

by Lord Grimcock October 16, 2008

WRNS

Officially, Women's Royal Naval Service, a sort of auxiliary RN for women that was brought in to relieve manpower shortages during the war. Also known as the Wrens.

Unofficially, for quite obvious reasons, Weekly Ration Naval Snatch.

I crave flange, when's that new WRNS arriving?

by Lord Grimcock May 8, 2009

ecky thump

What Bill Oddie says when a normal person would say 'fuck me rigid' or words to that effect.

Kate Humble: I'm going public about our relationship, Bill. By tomorrow morning the world will know about your propensity for freeform nambling and Belgian biscuit, you sick bastard.

Bill Oddie: Oh, ecky thump.

by Lord Grimcock November 15, 2009

swollocks

British. Swollen bollocks; overfull testicles, cliffhangers. Together with heightened aggression, cold-sweating and the shakes, symptomatic of DSB.

I gave him a right punt up the swollocks, mam.

by Lord Grimcock September 14, 2007