Grant Rampus's definitions
An affliction of the sexually active whose hips are sore from banging their significant other too fast, too long, in one sexual episode. While generally not considered a long term problem, those suffering from this medical condition will take solace knowing that, while their hips have a dull ache, those on the receiving end of Fucker’s Hip have been fucked into virtual paralysis.
Crawling from his bed to the bathroom, and unable to put together any semblance of a gait, Dave knew immediately he was a victim of Fucker’s Hip.
by Grant Rampus January 19, 2019
Get the Fucker’s Hip mug.Most men, particularly husbands, are earsighted - the condition of being borderline deaf when 3 feet from their spouse. Problem amplified when their wife is assigning chores or talking about her day. Fortunately, those afflicted with being earsighted are usually quite adept at hearing far away, like when their friend has pulled into the driveway to take them away.
The doctor put down his ear scope after examining Jeff and asked him if his wife started a new job. Upon Jeff confirming, the ear doctor explained that Jeff was suffering from a case of being earsighted.
by Grant Rampus January 28, 2022
Get the Earsighted mug.In corporate America the guy who wines and dines clients, occasionally resulting in new business. Most often named Chad or Ken, these guys are perpetually 32-years-old and store golf clubs in their trunks so they can sell their BS on a golf course. Unofficial concierges since they know every bar and restaurant in town.
by Grant Rampus July 9, 2016
Get the BD guy mug.The indescribable frustration felt waiting an eternity for the stop light to turn green at an intersection. Further exacerbated by thinking your light is changing and you start to go, only to be still red and the other lane starts turning. And you feel like an asshole sitting partially out in the intersection with a 40% chance of being T-boned.
by Grant Rampus August 8, 2016
Get the Stoplight rage mug.The mantra of every salesperson alive, they promise the client unachievable results if they just sign on the line. Once the dream is sold, the operations team then needs to unravel the web of deceit sold and "recalibrate" the client's expectations (i.e., the nightmare).
Todd: " How did we lose our biggest client last week?"
Tyler: "It seems once they talked with Operations they realized there was no way they could make that deadline. Another classic example of 'sell the dream, live the nightmare."
Tyler: "It seems once they talked with Operations they realized there was no way they could make that deadline. Another classic example of 'sell the dream, live the nightmare."
by Grant Rampus July 31, 2016
Get the Sell the dream, live the nightmare mug.The asshole in line at the counter of a convenience store who is oblivious to the growing line of customers behind them, while they continue to purchase more lottery tickets. Usually white trash as the main culprit, second place offenders are retirees. Problem amplified on pay day/social security check day.
What took you so long to get a loaf of bread?
Sorry, some line-dick was on a roll with scratch tickets.
Sorry, some line-dick was on a roll with scratch tickets.
by Grant Rampus July 11, 2016
Get the Line-dick mug.Generally a woman named Melinda or Judy that is single in her 40s (occasionally divorced in her late 50s), that wears a navy suit while researching and communicating health benefits. Other useless tasks endeavored include interviewing more qualified people then they are and facilitating sexual harassment trainings to those in the verge of bringing the company down with sexual exploitations of their admins.
by Grant Rampus July 4, 2016
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