Carl Stawicki's definitions

Menstrual Facial

A face full of any king of red sauce, like barbecue, ketchup, or wing sauce. The person's mouth area ends up looking like a bloody vagina, especially if the person has facial hair.

Joe ended up with a Menstrual Facial after finishing his plate of Buffalo Wings.

by Carl Stawicki February 2, 2009

Autobum

The seam down the back of a tight skirt on a woman whose ass is full of cellulite. The seam follows the line of her ass crack, thus resembling the Autobahn.

Mary may have looked good in that skirt in 1988, but today she’s sporting a Autobum.

by Carl Stawicki February 6, 2009

Urinal Yacker

Someone who insists on starting small talk while standing at the urinal.

Joe the Urinal Yacker makes others feel awkward while taking a piss.

by Carl Stawicki February 8, 2009

Ankle Bracelets

Hoop earrings that are large enough to fit the wearer's feet through, thus pinning their feet behind their head.

Mary's hoop earrings are so big they can be used as ankle bracelets.

by Carl Stawicki October 7, 2009

Lipshit

Lipstick or other lip crud that accumulates on a person's coffee mug, soda can, drinking straw, etc.

The lipshit on that can of Tab came from Mary's lipstick.

by Carl Stawicki June 7, 2009

Looking Flash

A twist on book title “Beyond the Looking Glass,” the term refers to the reflection of the camera flash that occurs when someone takes a self portrait while holding the camera up in the mirror. The flash reflects off the mirror and becomes the dominant subject. These cliché self-portraits are used excessively on social networking profiles.

Alice tried to take a picture of herself in the mirror, but only ended up with another Looking Flash.

by Carl Stawicki January 26, 2009

Mayonnaise Ma'am

Noun. A woman with a skinny ass that has no shape. "Mayonnaise" is a slur for "man ass."

You know a woman is a Mayonnaise Ma'am when you see her from behind and mistake her for a man. Hip-huggers fit her like a sock.

by Carl Stawicki August 8, 2008