Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

Texas t-shirt

An ass gasket. A paper toilet seat cover commonly found in public restrooms.

This expression has been common since at least the 1950s, and cold be older.

Mrs. Murphy put a Texas t-shirt onto the toilet seat in Hannigan's Bar.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005

ash tray breath

The typical breath stench of the redneck, fool, and skank. Caused by smoking a cigarette.

Karen has ash tray breath. It smells like the dung of a thousand camels.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005

trots

Loose bowels. The drizzy shits.

Braughton got the trots at her office this morning and didn't make it to the can.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005

slop swab

A napkin or serviette, used to wipe crumbs and gravy from your mouth at dinner.

Otto wiped his chops with a slob swab.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005

spade cat

An African American man.

This word was common among jazz musicians in the 1940s and 1950s, but fell out of favor in recent times because of politically correct bull. This was never a racial slur, although politically correct twits think it is today.

The spade cat lay down a great riff during his sax solo.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2005

child molester

A wishy-washy, namby-pamby white liberal euphemism for a person who rapes or has sexual intercourse with a child. Using the less offensive liberal expression removes much of the horror of the act, and lets liberals plead for mercy and gentle treatment of the malefactor.

A child molester should be called a child raper. A mosquito molests people. A child molester rapes and sodomizes little kids. These foul scums should be hanged, not coddled.

by Cap'n Bullmoose November 11, 2006

dooflap

A large, pendulous fur-covered appendage that hangs beneath the neck of a moose.

Bullregard the Moose has an 18-inch dooflap.

by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007