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A Minnesotan's definitions

Venus Glassing

An instance where a wifely figure is blamed for releasing fog-demons in an elevator. Also appropriate-and more well known-for the sounds emitted from the bathroom in the morning. I.e fogged mirrors from fog-demons.
'Honey...were those barking spiders or were you venus glassing again?'

*points at wife in elevator* 'she really enjoys venus glassing. It wasnt me'
by A Minnesotan November 20, 2018
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Welcome to Jackcity

A term only a pure douche hopped up on roids and an ego would use. Oftentimes in front of a mirror and whispers it to himself as he faintly smiles at his tally marked notebook of morning pullups...always left open so others can see (they werent pullups *cough*).

Also. Tis a lonely place in Jackcity so the amount of tally marks for workout are only outdone by the amount of JACKing off done (and yes there is a tally page for that as well)
Welcome to jackcity; where the doucheyness shines brighter than the roid glow.

Welcome to jackcity; if you can jack it you may become the town mayor.

Welcome to jackcity; where shirtless selfie mirrors are only as joyless as what they aaaactually serve at Whitecastle.
by A Minnesotan December 19, 2018
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Walmart Fabio

A long haired gent you imagine you'd run into at Walmart. Can tell he smells of grizzly wintergreen, juicy fruit and that hairspray your mom used to use.

His life goal more than likely resembles a house full of Sister Wives; obedient slaves willing to please him all the way down to his hamburger helper addiction.

I.e. Walmarts version of Gods gift to women
Gods gift to women? Ohh you mean Walmart Fabio!!

Oop. There goes Walmart Fabio with his harem of brainless slaves again. Pity they listen to that greasy haired narcissist.
by A Minnesotan February 22, 2019
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Split a Tangerine

Sex act which will ultimately end in the saddest 21st birthday imaginable. 9 partners (or less) in a tent. May cause the tent to cut away from the inside so adhere to caution; do not indulge this fantasy if you happen to be travelling in a chilly climate.
'Shall we split a tangerine?'
'Oh...I am SOO going to split a tangerine tonight'
'Splitting a tangerine is a beautiful thing'
'The yeti enjoys splitting tangerines'

'Sharing is caring if a tangerine is involved *wink wink*'
by A Minnesotan November 6, 2018
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Rhinoce-Rose

If Sarge was a flower he would be a Rhinoce-Rose
by A Minnesotan July 14, 2019
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Masterbaker

Someone who enjoys double clicking the mouse *ahem* which also (due to profession) may cause yeast infections, for males there may be a disturbing rising in the....*dough*.... also a legend in the pleasure department.
I hear you're a masterbaker.. any tips for helping my bread stick rise?

I am the masterbaker. Prepare to be rolled out and devoured.

'Yes...pharmacy? I recently had a one night stand with a masterbaker. Now I have an unnerving scent of cinnamon from my muffin and it won't go away...tips?'
by A Minnesotan December 13, 2018
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December the Ninth

Jordans birthday.

The Never Yeti believer.

We still love him though... so..

Happy Birthday Jordan 🎂🍾🎉
When shall we celebrate all things Jordan? December the Ninth. Because its awesome like Jordan.
by A Minnesotan December 10, 2019
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