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Santa's Take 

A word created for the head of household that get's to have unmitigated, no holds barred sex with their partner due to the amount of cash, credit & various other resources drummed out during the holidays in order to make the family happy and/or content.

May or may not be applied directly to anal sex with the wife/girlfriend - no questions asked.
Wife: "Now that everyone is gone from Christmas dinner, did you have a good time? By the way thanks for that diamond tennis bracelet you bought me dear..."

Husband: "I'm tired, full, half drunk & horny. Time for Santa's Take!"

Wife: "What is Santa's Take?"

Husband: "Bend that rump over and I'll show you. I will be debt for the next 12 months because your kids only wear Ralph Lauren and wanted diamond nipple rings. Now it's Santa's turn... It's time for Santa's Take!"

Wife: "yes dear. (bends over somewhat willingly)

/end
Santa's Take by WillyJK December 23, 2008
Urban Dictionary Merch

santa's little helper 

I love you Santa's Little Helper.
santa's little helper by Joe D April 23, 2005

Santa's lap 

The act of sitting on a mans lap, while having intercourse on Christmas Day (sex position where one person sits down and the other person bounces on top, creating enjoyable sex on the 25th of December)
"Dude she sat on Santa's lap at the Christmas party last night!"

santa's little helper 

a hot little booty that works for the ceo
Jimmy: Did you see the skirt on santa's little helper?
Sunny: Man, it's good to be santa, given her presents and all.
santa's little helper by Bombsky February 26, 2010

Santa's Big Red Sack

Preferably done around Christmas time. You go out and find a virgin, pop her cherry, and then paint your sack with her blood.
Hey Tom, this chick let me do Santa's Big Red Sack with her last night. It was awesome.
Santa's Big Red Sack by JayTree January 19, 2008

Santa's Stocking 

To ejaculate into somebodies sock as a practical joke
After sexing your missus,pull out and come in her sock and reply "Santa left you something from his fat sack."
Or
On your best friends mums birthday jack off into one of her socks,and reply
"Santa came early this year"
Or
Your bosses sock,friends sock,etc

Now that you know what a Santa's Stocking is, it's time to spread that Christmas joy, regardless of the time of year.
Santa's Stocking by O'Shay June 17, 2008

Santa's Secret Penguin Spy 

He is the most awesome penguin ever. Ziffle is not just any penguin. He is a secret spy sent by an agency to help keep an eye on boys and girls expecting a Christmas Eve visit from Santa Claus. Ziffle needs to know just one thing? Which children in the world are being naughty and which are being nice.

Ziffle is no elf. Armed with a cell phone with a direct line to Santa, he does not need a train, plane, or even wings to deliver his message. Ziffle can just text a name! But all the boys and girls know that if their mom or dad has to tell them twice, Ziffle has another secret spy device that allows Santa to see the entire human race from the comfort of his big chair at the North Pole.

In this enchanting holiday tale, a secret penguin spy partners with Santa to ensure that children around the world learn that it is always better to be nice than naughty!
Santa's Secret Penguin Spy is a bad bad a** like 007 style.
Hit him up at zifflebooks.com peace
More from Urban Dictionary
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy 

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.
Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
Word of the Day on September 20, 2026
any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear
hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh
hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026
Word of the Day on September 19, 2026

God Shot 

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".
Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."
God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011
Word of the Day on September 18, 2026
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