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Lie-Am

by HEHEHHEHEHHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHHE December 7, 2022
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Wipe lie

When after the first wipe, the toilet paper is clean but you wipe for a second time and realise it was just an illusion. It then takes half the roll to get clean.
I had a very satisfied smile after a clean first wipe but the next revealed I had been fooled, a wipe lie!
by HizerKite November 22, 2023
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Asians taking a lie detector test

POV:
ur asian taking a lie detector test
Son: "Hey dad, I took a lie detector test today."
Dad: "Oh ok, what score you get?"
Son: "Uh...it's a lie detector test, dad. There's no score, you either pass or fail."
Dad: "Okay, so did you pass or no?"
Son: "Well, you didn't want me to tell them how you raped my sister, right?"
Dad: "Shhh! Quiet! Someone could here you!"
Son: "Yeah, that's what I thought. Well, I lied about that, so you wouldn't get in trouble."
Dad: "Ok, good boy."
Son: "But the thing is... they detected that I had lied."
Dad: "WHAT??? FBI GUNNA SHOW UP AT DA FRONT DOR ANY MINUT NOW! STOOBID!"

Son: "No dad, they won't. I killed them all before they could call the cops."
Dad: *stares at son for a while* "Okay, good boy. You want some ice cream?"
Son: "Uh....Sure, but that's not all."
Dad: "Oh my god. What now, son? Hah?"
Son: "In order to lie.... I had to fail the test."
Dude 1: Did you hear about those asians taking a lie detector test?
Dude 2: Yeah, I haven't seen 'em since, do you know where they are?
Dude 1: No...
by PORGSSSS November 28, 2023
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Son: "In order to lie.... I had to fail the test."
Dad: *pulls off shoe and throws it at son*
Son: "Ow! Dad, don't you want this? This way no one will kn-"

Dad: *pulls out glock 19 and starts firing at son*
Son: *barely dodges bullets* "Dad, stop!"
Dad: "You fail test! You stoobid! You not my son!" *pulls out AK-102*
Son: *gets hit in leg* "Ow! Dad, you have to stop!"
Dad: *ignores son* *dismembers son with five shells from a Challenger 2*
Son: *groans in agony*
Dad: *tases what's left of son's body *
Son: *attempts to scream in agony, but instead blood comes out of his mouth*
Dad: "You not my son! Son no fail test!" *lifts off in a A-10 Warthog armed with the Gauzer machine gun*
Son: "Please dad.....please..."
Dad: *crashes plane into son, ejecting himself 30 inches from the ground*
Son: .
Dad: *raids a U.S. Army bunker and steals 10 nukes*
Dad: *nukes house with son in it, then nukes the whole country just for good measure*
Dad: *evades paparazzi and kills families to live in their houses for 4 decades*
Dad: *becomes president, nukes the world then uses mods to terraform Mars*
Dad: *rapes your mom 10 times to repopulate the human race*
Dad: *eventually dies at age 142, wearing a suit with a red rose in his lapel and sunglasses*
No wonder we never saw that kid again.... Holy shit!

And that's why you've never heard of: Asians taking a lie detector test Part 2
by PORGSSSS November 28, 2023
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Lie

WHEN EEVEE SAYS SHE LOOKS ANYTHING LESS THAN PERFECT
Thats a lie, You look perfect
by H0T M4N December 7, 2023
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Lie For Me

Lie For Me just said my post wasn’t true.
by Amschel December 12, 2023
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Drink, Swear, Steal and Lie

I was 12 when daddy said to me
"Don't take to drinking, boy
That road don't lead nowhere
And don't you ever let me hear you swear
Don't you dare"
He told me, "Stealing's a lazy man's way
Something for nothing leaves you hell to pay
So, don't buy into it
And then you can look the whole world in the eye"
Honey, I've tried
But since I met you, girl
I've been breaking every rule
I must confess, I'm just a backsliding fool
I want to drink from your loving cup
Swear I'll never give you up
Steal all your kisses underneath the moon
I wanna lie here close to you
Look at what you made me do
Darling, you're the reason why I drink, swear, steal and lie
Last night I threw away the 12-step book
I finally faced the fact that I am hooked on you
There's nothing more that I can do
Ain't no use
'Cause every time I see your angel face
My halo disappears without a trace, I swear
Girl, I'd admit I haven't got a prayer
But I don't care
I know this ain't exactly how I was raised
But heaven help me, honey
I ain't changing my ways
I want to drink from your loving cup
Swear I'll never give you up
Steal all your kisses underneath the moon
I wanna lie here close to you
Look at what you made me do
Darling, you're the reason why I drink, swear, steal and lie
I want to drink from your loving cup
Swear I'll never give you up
Steal all your kisses underneath the moon
I wanna lie here close to you
Look at what you made me do
Darling, you're the reason why I drink, swear, steal and lie
Drink, swear, steal and lie
by Death Menace August 25, 2023
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