A complex formula for determining the optimum level of
window-opening required in an
office.
x = (3.4 I/T) + (D/3) / WY
x = amount of window-opening required
I = irritation caused to colleagues by window-opening, measured in furyons
D = thickness of denim jacket worn by the window-opener, measured in Status Quos
W = daily amount of non-window-opening work done by window-opener
Y = yellowness of hair of window opener
As W always equals 0 the solution to the equation is always
infinity.
Newton: That's what I hate most about Felders. Opening
windows willy-nilly.
Hovis: Its not as random as it appears. He can't embark on his
window-opening tours without
first solving the Feldman Equation.