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Central Billing Theorem

In simulation theory, the central billing theorem states that any simulation of the universe where people still have to pay their bills is indistinguishable from the real universe.
Who cares if the universe is a simulation?! I still gotta pay my damn bills! Your ass never heard of the Central Billing Theorem?!
by epluribusnihilo August 16, 2024
mugGet the Central Billing Theoremmug.

The Repeating Idiocy Theorem

The Repeating Theorem discusses how stupid people will repeat the same dumb choices because they're too idiotic to learn from consequences.
"I want to get back with my ex." - (Idiot, probably named Brad)

"YOU FUCKING DUMBASS! YOU'RE AN IDIOT! I MADE THE REPEATING IDIOCY THEOREM TO SHOW HOW YOUR DUMBASS CONTINUSIONLY MAKES THE SAME RETARDED CHOICES!" - Me (Fuck you guy, probably named Brad, you idiot)
by Theoremist November 22, 2023
mugGet the The Repeating Idiocy Theoremmug.

the Wicker Chair Theorem

People often jump to a conclusion about something based on what they see in front of them. Said conclusion is usually not based in fact.
(setting- a hotel room in Mackinac Island)

Me: Where is the TV?

My mom: They don't allow TVs on the island.

Me: Yet another application of the wicker chair theorem!
by tiffany0128 May 21, 2011
mugGet the the Wicker Chair Theoremmug.

The Fish Piano Theorem

The theory that a fish species, given an infinite amount of time, will create an exact replica of a piano. Then due to the existence of a piano, there will eventually be a fish version of Mozart that will create his pieces exactly.
"You ever heard of 'The Fish Piano Theorem'?"
by FishPianoTheorem November 22, 2024
mugGet the The Fish Piano Theoremmug.

Ocean King Theorem

Cambridge International Education IGCSE First Language English exams always tend to have something in common. There will always be an 'implicit meaning' point of something attempting to be funny but the students never find it amusing, which is why they usually lose points in those points. This conundrum is usually referred to as the 'Ocean King Theorem' due to it being always referenced to a past exam that had a man supposed to be funny known as the Ocean King.
That exam we just did had an Ocean King Theorem ass joke. Whoever wrote this test needs better humor, I never knew a Bengal tiger was meant to be funny.
by marcelorhvp May 10, 2024
mugGet the Ocean King Theoremmug.

The Infinite Monkey Theorem

Everything that can happen, will happen, given enough time.
A: Did you hear? The Patriots came back from a 25 point deficit to win the Superbowl!
B: Wow, that's like stuff from the Infinite Monkey Theorem.
by Azshara October 7, 2020
mugGet the The Infinite Monkey Theoremmug.

Lion king theorem

When two people have an argument. They play the lion king movie in the background, one guy can only speak while simba is on screen and the other may speak while simba is off screen.
The presidential debate is on tonight ? Fuck a mediator let’s use the lion king theorem.
by Spinter April 22, 2021
mugGet the Lion king theoremmug.

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