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talk to the face cause the hand ain't listening 

1. an invitation to cease "talking to the hand" and instead commence talking to the face, as the hand is no longer listening.
talk to the face cause the hand ain't listening

You are the shit that the flies don't want to eat

An insult used on someone who is so worthless that if that person was a pile of shit, flies would stray off it.
Amy: I only slept with him cuz you are terrible in bed Jared, he's much better than you, you loser.
Jared: Amy, you know what? Go fuck yourself, You are the shit that the flies don't want to eat , and i hope you die sad and alone.

dude I am so sorry I didn't get back to you earlier but I was out of town and was not able and I was going to try and get to the good old days in order for you guys probably going back and I didn't want to go to the bottom earthquake and I was

the big boys are the same and you can get them on the way to your house or to the good old place and they will be able to voice your life with you and your family is a great thing to do in your life that and your family your life is the best one find find a good
to the old days in the world and you will find that you have a great life for you as well and you are a sad and beautiful girl that will never be able and you want to be a good friend

and you are a great person who is very proud of yourself and the way you are and will be your life is the only thing that you can make a perfect life in your life is before the first year of the year and you are the only one who can suck your life

dude I am so sorry I didn't get back to you earlier but I was out of town and was not able and I was going to try and get to the good old days in order for you guys probably going back and I didn't want to go to the bottom earthquake and I was

When Today Is Friday But John Didn't Go To The Movies: 

A meme on Reddit that people started making darker versions of like, John didn't go to the movies because he was killed by minions.
Wanna go to the movies on Friday John?
When today is Friday but John didn't go to the movies:

I don't mean to fling olives on the floor but...

An idiom used to preface vocalizing something everyone knows and should be acknowledged but no body wants to hear
I don't mean to fling olives on the floor but... this water cooler conversation is going to make us late for the meeting

I don't have the facts to back this up 

A phrase said prior to any ridiculous statement to give the illusion of validity.
"Now, I don't have the facts to back this up, but I believe Herman Cain was born in Indonesia."