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west nile virus

A relatively rare and harmless virus, spread by mosquitos. Symptoms include fever, headache, and body aches, with occasional skin rashes and/or swollen lymph nodes. A few weeks of bed rest will usually take care of it.

But if West Nile is such a weak virus, why has the news media gone crazy over it? News stations in America have taken advantage of a rare condition called encephalitis to turn the molehill of West Nile into a mountain that rivals the Ebola virus. Encephalitis is a swelling of the brain - a very serious condition that can SOMETIMES be caused by West Nile. Note that when I say "sometimes" I mean it in the sense that "sometimes" people die from chickenpox. Tons of common childhood diseases can cause encephalitis, including measels, chickenpox, mono, and the flu. Remember that the next time CNN tries to warn you about the evil mosquitoes that are threatening to kill us all.
When I got west nile, I was out of school for 3 days. When I got the chickenpox, I was out of school for almost a month. Think about that for awhile.
by progamer124 September 7, 2004
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DARE

Drug Abuse Resistance Education. An anti-drug program with a seriously flawed reputation, at times giving out misleading , inaccurate, or outright false information. Critics often point to the lack of any evidence that DARE actually affects drug use. Drug users (and kids in general) often ridicule the program.
I saw the DARE officer smoking in the parking lot.
by progamer124 December 14, 2004
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Irony

One of the most misused words in the entire English language.

There are several types of irony.

Socratic irony - When someone pretends to be naive about a certain subject, and uses his questions about it to point out a flaw in the established belief. This is often used on the TV show South Park, where the children often ask questions about a situation until the folly in a parent's decision becomes clear.

Sarcasm - Understatement, mocking overstatement, or heavy-handed irony (stating the flat opposite of the truth) where both parties are aware of the difference between what's said and what's actually happening.

Situational Irony - The irony that most people think of. A difference between what you expect to happen (in a story, for example) and what actually happens. Rain on your wedding day would be a sort-of example, because a wedding day is generally expected to be a perfect, happy day. The good advice you didn't take, however, would NOT be irony, because that has nothing to do with what is expected and what isn't expected. A traffic jam when you're already late wouldn't be irony either; there's no automatic expectation that traffic will be fine, just because you happen to be late.

Irony of Fate - The concept that the Gods, Fates, etc. are toying with humans for amusement by using irony. Beethoven's loss of hearing is a famous example; one would expect a composer to be able to hear his compositions, but fate denied him that ability.

Tragic (Dramatic) Irony - When the audience knows something that some of the characters don't know in a play/movie/novel/whatever. For example, when the horror flick psycho is in the house and the homeowner just goes in without suspecting anything.
So, yeah, Alanis was wrong in a lot of her song, but there ARE some examples of irony in there - and a few that are kinda-sorta, but could be better. The old man who buys a lottery ticket is one; it would be a better example if he won, and then died of a heart attack from the shock of winning.
by progamer124 December 16, 2004
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nth

Short for Nothing. It is apparently Asian internet lingo.
I'm doing absolutely nth all week.
by progamer124 December 19, 2004
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socialite

Someone who has money and doesn't work, instead devoting his/her life to being "socially active." Socialites go to parties, gather media attention, and essentially "work" at being popular. This often comes at the expense of any meaningful contribution to society or culture (outside of catchphrases-that-aren't-really-catchphrases, like Paris Hilton's "That's Hot").
Paris Hilton is a classic example of a socialite.
by progamer124 January 3, 2005
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keyser soze

Character played by Kevin Spacey in the 1995 movie, "The Usual Suspects." The character is most remembered for a story about him, told to a police officer in the movie:

"He's supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody ever believed he was real. Nobody ever knew him or saw anybody that ever worked directly for him. But to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew; that was his power. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist. One story the guys told me, the story I believe, was from his days in Turkey. There was a gang of Hungarians that wanted their own mob. They realized that to be in power, you didn't need guns or money or even numbers. You just needed the will to do what the other guy wouldn't. After a while, they come into power and then they come after Soze. He was small-time then, just running dope, they say. They come to his home in the afternoon, looking for his business. They find his wife and kids in the house and decide to wait for Soze. He comes home to find his wife raped and children screaming. The Hungarians knew Soze was tough, not to be trifled with, so they let him know they meant business. They tell him they want his territory, all his business. Soze looks over the faces of his family. Then he showed these men of will what will really was. He tells him he would rather see his family dead than live another day after this. He lets the last Hungarian go, waits until his wife and kids are in the ground, and then he goes after the rest of the mob. He kills their kids. He kills their wives. He kills their parents and their parents' friends. He burns down the houses they live in, the stores they work in. He kills people that owe them money. And like that, he's gone. Underground. Nobody's ever seen him since. He becomes a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night. 'Rat on your pop and Keyser Soze will get you.' But no one ever really believes."

Soze's character was based on real-life murderer John List, who murdered his mother, wife, and three children, then disappeared for 18 years. When he was found and captured, he had started a completely new life as Robert Peter Clark.

The term "Keyser Soze" has become synonymous with someone who is elusive and legendary - someone who everyone hears about, but noone ever meets in person.
He owes me money, but I can't collect - he's harder to find than Keyser Soze.
by progamer124 January 4, 2005
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1+1=3

Reproduction joke. The "1+1" refers to two people having sex; the extra 1 represents a potential baby, making a total of 3 people.
"I'm gonna get laid tonight!"
"Whatever man, just remember sometimes 1+1=3."
by progamer124 January 4, 2005
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