newsvava's definitions

Shomi and blow me

When you run out of things to watch on Netflix and you're done just chilling

"I am hoping tonight's date moves past Netflix and Chill...could use a Shomi and blow me."

by newsvava July 29, 2016

baby unicorn tears

The most sincere tears of all.

Guy: Baby, the airport's closed and I can't make it home for Christmas!

Girl: Are you serious?! Baby unicorn tears!

by newsvava February 12, 2009

trader nugget

Links to videos or websites etc. that people send each other, i.e. nuggets that people trade.

Girl 1: Holy fuck have you been on urbandictionary.com? Soooo funny!

Girl 2: Dude, staple trader nugget.

by newsvava February 12, 2009

diarrheets

Bird shits, or when the frequency or runnyness of your own shitting comes to resemble that of birds.

"I must have parked beneath the bird anal clinic, because when I got to my car it was covered in diarrheets."

"I'm so glad the library has a wheelchair bathroom. The books and quietness always give me the diarrheets."

by newsvava February 9, 2009

hells mells

Totally relaxed and chill, a.k.a. hella mellow.

Girl 1: So I hear you scared off George Clooney with your repeated text messages.

Girl 2: Whatever!! I sent him like TWO texts. It was hells mells!

Girl 1: Whoa, you need to mellow out. You know George Clooney scares off easily.

by newsvava February 12, 2009

hello program

If you are required to say hello to someone when you see them, you are on a hello program with them.

The hello list is comprised of all the individual people with whom you are on a hello program.

Girl: Hello

Guy: Hello

Girl's friend: Why the fuck did you say hello to that guy?

Girl: Gaa, he bought my textbook. Now we're on an eternal hello program.

by newsvava February 13, 2009

angelina jolie turns gay with megan fox

The most spectacular event imaginable in the universe.

Preceded by if/when/unless to represent the sort of circumstances under which you might change your mind about something.

Girl 1: Are you coming to Josh's party tonight?

Girl 2: Meh, I gots to work tomorrow. But call me when you're there if Angelina Jolie turns gay with Megan Fox.

**Later that night**

Girl 1: Hey! They just found Osama bin Laden hiding in Josh's basement!!

Girl 2: Dude, I'm sleeping. I said to call me if Angelina Jolie turned gay with Megan Fox.

by newsvava February 12, 2009