nethcev!'s definitions

shampoo

The word’s origins come from sham, French, meaning false or fake - and poo, slang, referring to biological excrement more commonly referred to as “shit”. Thus, one can only assume that shampoo is “false excrement” or “fake shit.”

Examples of shampoo include: Prell, Clairol, Nioxin, Suave, etc.

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

Envious

A state of emotional being, characterized by the desire for one to be in another’s shoes. As apposed to “jealous”, which is an emotional state where one deems that if he/she cannot have Reebok, then all others must go barefoot.

"I'm truly envious of his situation."

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

Chemistry

The study of meaningless numbers and letters through complex equations, usually taught by a professor who owns or operates a methamphetamine lab on the side to help subsidize his/her meager income.

While I failed high school chemistry, my teacher was fired the following year for incompetence.

by nethcev! August 23, 2006

Confidence

1. A façade intended to attract and persuade prospective ladies to march to the rhythm of a man’s libido.
2. A telltale sign of blind ignorance.

"I have no confidence in a man of confidence."

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

Dandelion

A bastard blossom, a parasitic pansy, an annoying destructive weed which can be fermented into decent wine.

The word "dandelion" is derived from French, and means "lion's tooth" because of the dandelion's toothed leaves.

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

Jihad

A controversial Islamic practice which, contrary to popular belief, does not strictly refer to holy war, but taken literally means “to struggle”. In the Qu’ran it refers to an internal struggle inside everyone between the desire to enjoy the pleasures of this world, or to seek God’s will. When an Islamic cleric declares “It is the duty of all true Muslims to wage Jihad against the infidel”, what he most often means is “it is the duty of all true Muslims to struggle against the ways, practices, ethics and morals of the infidel”. In modern times this usually means that Muslim youth need to struggle against the West’s commercialization and perversion of certain subjects, such as sex for example. They’re calling they’re followers to boycott Western movies that show and promote indecent exposure, to boycott CD’s which promote and un-Islamic way of life, (usually gangsta rap, rock and roll and pop) and they encourage their ladies to wear the hajaff or beka out of modesty and so as not to lead Muslim gentlemen into temptation and impure thoughts.

"It is the duty of all true Muslims to wage jihad against the infidels."

by nethcev! August 24, 2006

elementary school

An introductory academic program that leads students through the first four to eight years of their education. It is here where tomorrow’s young scholars are taught the essential “three R’s”; Reading, Writing, Recess, and of course gym….but that’s technically not an “R”…. is it?

For a perfect example of an elementary school, drive to that part of the neighborhood where all the speed limit signs say "slow children at play."

by nethcev! August 24, 2006